So I
started watching Tiger King: Murder, Mayhem and Madness on Netflix
after hearing how crazy and insane it was. Instead of covering it
like a regular The Review I decided to write down my reactions as I
watched the series. This will be for episodes one and two.
Episode
1 Thoughts
Who
the fuck likes tigers this much?
Holy
shit, that is a lot of tigers!
Oh,
god. This man's hair is the worst.
Wow.
Joe's never been good looking.
Who
the fuck takes their kids to a place with live animals with an owner
that looks like him?!
I hope
you all get bit.
So you
can just buy guns and dynamite like that? Okay.
This
dude is fucking insane.
I am
never going to Oklahoma!
Episode
2 Thoughts
Oh,
someone got attacked by a tiger?! Shocking. Holy shit her arm! It
gone!
Yeah,
you better hide the customers. Wait. Stuck their arm in a cage? “I
am never gonna financially recover from this.” Sir.
Oh,
shit. She ain't got no arm! “I said amputate it.” Goddamn it. And
she still down for the cause?! “This is just another day for me to
overcome.” I never want that day! I also would not go to a animal
place where people are missing limbs. Just sayin'.
Oh,
who is this elephant riding asshole? And why are they playing The
Wire them song?
This
Antle dude seems shady as fuck. I wouldn't follow him into my own
apartment.
Oh,
who is this guy? If people care they need to donate money...to him.
Stop owning tigers you freaks!
Carole
seems like she is doing the right thing...for her. Her set up looks
like everyone she is fighting so far.
Oh we
got a dude that ran that devil's dandruff and running them tigers?
Wait. Who the fuck stuffs a snake with drugs?! What am I watching?!
Okay,
I get it. Less Scarface more Tiger King.
She
dressing the monkeys. She...dressing...the monkeys!
So Doc
Antle has a lot of wives. Why? Why would you want that in your life?
And they arrive as teenagers. Okay. Cool. Cool. I know a sex cult
when I see one.
This
girl had her dad drop her off at Antle's place and he did it. How
much you hate your kid to actually do that?
Okay,
so it is a sex cult. Gotcha. He was spiritually enlightening these
girls with dick.
HAHAHAHAHA!!! This song started playing and this guy that looks like Gollum started
smiling! Oh, Joe's got multiple men's. Travis fell into a gay trap.
Joe used some gay Vulcan mind meld on him.
This
is the ugliest wedding I have ever seen in my life.
These
tribal tattoos are killing me.
Antle
was paying on $100 a week?!
Seems
Carole tricked people into working for free. Well played. Oh, what
song is this woman singing? Please stop. Oh, no. She still singing.
Oh, this is a bad song. How you gonna sing about being free?
Everything is in a cage!
So Joe
wanted to drop grenades from a helicopter over Carole's place.
I am
not mad at the outfits these women Antle is mind controlling. Oh, he
forced one of these women to get implants. Where do you find people
this dumb?
Joe's
employees eating expired meat.
Wait.
Carole's husband is missing. Joe thinks she fed him to her tigers. I
kinda believe him.
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