The Review: Practical Magic

Practical Magic 8/10

A couple of weeks ago L and I watched this crazy movie called Practical Magic. I had heard of this film but did not know who was in it or what it was about. In the late '90s so I knew it was going to be weird. This starts off with a witch being hung named Maria Owens. She ends up surviving when the rope snaps after she steps off and all the towns people take off running. The father of her baby ends up dying and she makes a spell to keep herself from ever falling in love. Over time this jacked up spell ends up becoming a curse and now any man who falls in love with her descendants will die after this crazy little beetle starts chirping. We fast forward to these two sisters named Sally and Gillian and one day their mother hears the bug and their dad ends up dying. I forget how the mom dies actually. So they move in with their two crazy aunts named Francis and Jet. These two odd ladies are all about magic and letting the kids enjoy themselves while also dealing with everyone in town who thinks that they are witches and talks trash to the little girls.

Documentality: Death Of A Pastor's Wife

Death Of A Pastor's Wife 8/10

So me and my lady watch this insane documentary called Death Of A Pastor's Wife on Netflix. I was trying to figure out how I was going to even write this because it's hard to talk about it without inserting my own thoughts. This is about a lady named Mica Francis who started going to this guy named John-Paul Miller's church when she was 13 years old. John-Paul was married with four children and also had a child from a previous relationship. He starts having an affair with Mica and he and his wife get separated. By the way, it wasn't as if this pastor admitted to this affair. His wife found messages on his phone and there is video of him laying on his lawn crying like a little bitch. I wanted to elbow drop him when I was watching this. So he starts being with Mica out in public and dating her. By the way Michael was this guy's babysitter as well. And his now ex-wife looks like Mica. It's very creepy.

The Review: Mother Mary

Mother Mary 0/10

This movie was ass. A few weeks ago we watched this movie called Mother Mary. Did not know anything about it but from the poster knew that it was starring one actress I knew and another that I had seen before and thought had a very creepy looking appearance. We ended up looking her up online and it turns out that she has or looks to have had some work done and comes across as very scary looking. I know that this movie is not about this actress and what she has done to herself allegedly. But I just had to point this out because as I watch the movie I kept being creeped out by the way she looked. This movie is about a pop star making a comeback after an incident on stage. I don't know why I'm being vague. It look like she tried to kill herself at one point. So she goes and finds her old costume designer named Sam and wants her to give her a new look before her next tour that starts in three days.

The Review: The Long Walk

The Long Walk 3/10

This is not going to be very long because I don't have too much to say about a movie that has such a basic plot. I ended up splitting this into two parts because I was waiting for it to improve and it just did not because the movie is what it is: a long walk. So the basic premise is that 50 boys from every state in America are picked and they have to keep a pace of three miles an hour and if they go slower than that after a few warnings they are shot and killed. The reason they are doing this is because the winner gets to make a wish. The story mainly focuses on one of the kids and I think the biggest surprise of this movie was how it ended. I believe I would have enjoyed this more if I had seen previous winners and/or what they receive for their wish. I wonder what is not allowed as a wish. I wonder what happens if you don't make a wish. How long until you have to make a wish? I didn't know enough about the characters or the history of this program to really care so when it ended I just shrugged. It is just “Hi, my name is Victim 12! I am gonna wish for money! Ow! My foot hurt!” Bang!!! This could have been a segment on a anthology series.

Cooper Hoffman as Raymond "Ray" Garraty

David Jonsson as Peter "Pete" McVries

Garrett Wareing as Billy Stebbins

Tut Nyuot as Arthur "Art" Baker

Charlie Plummer as Gary Barkovitch

Mark Hamill as the Major

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The Review: Good Boy

Good Boy 7/10

So last week L and I watched three movies. I watched one that she had already seen before. Out of all of them this was my favorite one. This is about a dog named Indy. All I knew about this movie was that it was a ghost story told through the perspective of a dog. I had already seen a movie that I really liked that was told through the perspective of a ghost so I was interested on how they were going to do this one. So there's this dude named Todd and we don't even see his face until the end of the movie that has a lung disease. For the longest time I thought he was a drug addict or something. Turns out that's not the case. The movie starts off with him just sitting up on his couch bleeding and this poor dog just staring at him until Todd's sister shows up and he goes to a hospital.

The Review: Widow's Bay

Widow's Bay 9/10

I would suggested watching this series Widow's Bay (on Apple TV which means I signed up for a week long trail) and after hearing about how well the show was received decided to check it out. L made it through one episode and decided that she didn't want to continue. I did and ended up finishing the last nine episodes this weekend. I don't tend to binge watch shows but this one is such an easy and fast watch that I did not realize how quickly I was plowing through it. I read today that there is going to be a second season and even if there was not I could imagine slightly how the town would have carried on after the finale. This is going to be full of spoilers.

The Review: The Last House

The Last House -2/10

Greta Lee as Ann

Wagner Moura as Jason

Riley Chung as 8-Year-Old Ruth

Emma Ho as 13-Year-Old Ruth

Arden Cho as adult Ruth

Noah Alexander Sosnowski as 12-Year-Old Graham

Gabriel Chung as 17-Year-Old Graham

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The Review: Strung

 Strung 0/10

Chloe Bailey as Laila Calloway

Lynn Whitfield as Audra Jelani

Lucien Laviscount as Marcus Walker

Anna Diop as Imani Walker

Coco Jones as Jasmine

Romy Woods as Zuri

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The Review: Another Man's Wife

Another Man's Wife 0/10

So this past weekend we managed to watch two terrible movies. Another Man's Wife. It's about this guy who's crazy rich. He's a tech guy and he created a dating app. Next we have a couple named Maya and Shawn. Shawn works making video games (which to me at this point seems like a job that's not going to exist in like two years). Maya, I am not sure what job she has but it involves fundraising. Seriously sitting here right now I am not sure what this woman does for a living. So Shawn heads the work and he finds out that he's getting laid off because of the competition. He decides not to tell his wife about this. Oh, and he finds out that his mother has cancer. What kind of cancer does she have? They don't say. How long does she have to live? They make it seem as if she doesn't get treatment in an hour she's going to die. Meanwhile Maya got a promotion. She is having the best day ever and she gets home and Shawn is like “Oh my mama dying.” She feels terrible for him.

The Review: Mortal Kombat 2

Mortal Kombat Two 0/10

I am not going to waste my time writing a lot about this movie. I love the 90s version of Mortal Kombat. I've even liked some of the animated films. The one that came out a few years ago was far better than it had any right to be. But this one I was worried about even from seeing the trailer. So I watch this yesterday and was so disappointed. The acting, the special effects, and the story were absolutely trash. I am not sure why they took such a huge step back from the previous film and making this one but it sucks. I have zero desire to see the upcoming Street Fighter film. I'm not sure what they need to do to make Mortal Kombat a watchable film other than duplicate what they did in the first one and enhance it.

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Sitting In The Aisle: Spider-Man Brand New Day

Spider-Man Brand New Day 7/10

So I just watched the latest Spider-Man. Three people I know told me that I needed to see this movie and I was on the fence about it since I first saw the trailer. I tend to judge these movies based on how many goosebumps I get and I didn't get any watching it. The main reason is because of that Doomsday movie that's coming out later this year. To me there are no stakes because people can be brought back from other realities or just brought back to life. I used to read comic books all the time and I know that this happens in those, but with the films I actually like that there seem to be some form of permanence with these characters deaths. For as sad as it is that Aunt May died in December we can see her come back to life. So while watching this movie I did enjoy it but there was just a cloud of doubt that anything that actually happened in his film would have stakes.

The Review: The Vampire Lestat

The Vampire Lestat 10/10

It's hard to try and describe this show. The fact that a lot of it bounces through time makes it hard to try and talk about this in a linear fashion so I'm not gonna even try. So far this show has managed to do three incredible seasons. That is close to being unheard of in this day and age. I was worried that there would be little interaction between Louis or Daniel or Armand this season because I've read these books and I need to realize that they have done something so different with this series that it is gotten to a point that I and a lot of other people need to let those books go. I see so many arguments and anger about certain things that are changed when people either don't realize or seem to forget that Interview With The Vampire, Lestat, and Queen of the Damned are pretty much the only good books in that series that contains so many books. No, I do need to point out that the Mayfair Witches or the Witching Hour is a very good book but they have managed to make a horrible series out of it.

The Review: Obsession

Obsession 1/10

This is a video/audio version of my review for the movie Obsession. I had to do it this way because I was full of far too many complaints to type it out.

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The Review: They Will Kill You

They Will Kill You 3/10

Okay. So when L and I watched this I knew who was starring in it and as the movie began had some basic idea of what it was possibly about. Woman named Asia and her younger sister we thought was her daughter are on the run from their abusive father. He finds them at a store and as he is about to capture them Asia shoots him and he grabs the younger sister Maria. Asia is like "Deuces!" and leaves her sister behind. Years later Asia been in and out of jail I guess and learning every fighting technique known to man. She gets into this place called The Virgil by stealing someone's identity.

Documentality: Bang My Box The Robyn Byrd Story

F

Bang My Box The Robyn Byrd Story 9/10

This was a damn good documentary L suggested. This is about Robin Byrd. She hosted a public access series called The Robin Byrd Show in Manhattan where she spoke about sex, love, life, championed causes for the LGBTQ community, and safe sex. And this is something she kinda fell into. A show she had showed up on was being canceled (Hot Legs) and they just sorta threw her on and the show blew up. This show aired from 1977 to 1998. She went against the government during the shitty Ronald Reagan era (I shit you not when I was about 5 or 6 years old I wrote an article for the school paper about him titled “Bad Actor Makes Worse President”) and she won. Robin had been in adult films and would have adults performers on the show to just hang out, talk, dance, and speak with callers live on air. This could not exist now. People suck.