The Review: Death Of A Unicorn

Death Of A Unicorn 2/10

This movie was ass. I kept seeing an ad for it on my HBO and after looking through multiple streaming services and landed on this. Poster looked interesting and I didn't know anything about it so I checked it out. This father Elliot is driving with his daughter Ridley to meet with his boss in this fancy estate. Elliot's wife is dead. They seem to hem and haw about this so let me just point that out because in most films and TV shows the only reason a father is hanging with their daughter is cause the mama dead. So they driving and he is on the phone and blowing his nose and not paying attention as Ridley vapes sitting right next to him and they both lose service on their devices. He ends up hitting the hell out of a for real unicorn. Ridley touches the horn and has a whole out of body experience. She awakens when her father is bashing its head in. They arrive to meet Elliot's boss Odell, his wife Belinda, and his son Shepard. They are all rich folk stereotypes. Odell looks like he could die at any moment.

Elliot realizes he no longer needs his glasses to see and Ridley's skin clears up. Its because unicorn blood got on them. Suddenly the car in the driveway starts moving. The unicorn is still alive and trying to bust out. One of Odell's assistants shoots it dead and they start experimenting with it. Odell gets healed. His scientists grind up horn bone and see what they can do. Ridley keeps having visions and researching unicorn lore. Elliot becomes more and more of an asshole for no reason until he gives the reason (the ol' “I'm only being unavailable and a dick because I promised your mother I would do everything for you!” trope). A big ass monster unicorn shows up and starts killing people and wrecking shit. By the point I had mentally checked out of this movie. I wasn't laughing, gasping, or caring what happened to anyone. Long story short, every dies but Elliot (he does die but unicorns bring him back and turn into nice looking unicorns again) and Ripley and unicorns knock the car they are arrested in off the road. I guess so they can die and be with the mother? Because Ripley thinks that after her unicorn vision she was going to see mother?

This movie had no style or flavor. Seems to be influenced by other better made films. The gore was silly and did nothing to add to any horror aspect that was attempted. The comedy was not funny. People kept having character changes out of nowhere that wasn't explained. The touching parts felt forced. What sucks is that I like a lot of the people that were cast in this...in other films and shows. I don't know anyone I would be able to suggest this to and I know quite a few people that are into silly shit. I couldn't imagine seeing this in theaters and how I would have felt leaving. Mad that I wasted money. If they had picked a tone this could've worked. If it was straight comedy because of the lead, maybe. Horror could have worked. Fantasy with the unicorns perhaps. But trying to do all three made this feel like a jambalaya of nonsense.

Paul Rudd as Elliot Kintner

Jenna Ortega as Ridley Kintner

Will Poulter as Shepard Leopold

Anthony Carrigan as Griff

Sunita Mani as Dr. Bhatia

Stephen Park as Dr. Song

Jessica Hynes as Shaw

Téa Leoni as Belinda Leopold

Richard E. Grant as Odell Leopold

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