The New Halle Berry Theory

Halle Berry is a confusing puzzle to solve. Now before you read any further understand that I know this woman's life is none of my business but I have lots of time, type quickly, and enjoy gossip. Now as I was saying, Halle is confusing. I have seen her in person once and she is very beautiful. I have described her as too beautiful. I have written about her and her marriage here and described what I call the Halle Berry Theory here a few years ago after she kept popping up in the news for random reasons.

Recently she has been in the news because of her and Olivier Martinez pending divorce and I was like "Damn, how many times has this woman been married?" Turns out four times. Imagine walking down the aisle and telling god and whoever is there that you're doing this till death do you part four separate times. If you look it up a lot of actors and actresses back in the day would do this too. Another reason she is in the news is because one of her previous spouses, David Justice, spoke out about her. For those that don't know, everyone thought he was the one that hit her so hard she says she lost 80% of the hearing in one of her ears so when you thought of this guy you thought baseball and hit Halle. He has since deleted these tweets. Some say it was Christopher Williams that hit her who then said it was Wesley Snipes. 

"Reading the latest Halle Berry Reports, it wasn't me who hit Halle causing the ear damage. Halle has never said that I hit her. It was a former Hollywood boyfriend that she told me! #getyourfactsright When she first reported that she had been in abusive relationships,she wouldn't name the 'famous' former boyfriend She was mad at me leaving the relationship so she and her Hollywood Team just tried to destroy my character. It had to be my fault,right? Yup. Me, Eric, Gabriel and Olivier were all her 'Knight in Shining Armor' until it ends. Then we all become the worst guys in history. Only the guys in the relationship with Halle know the real deal there will be another, of course. He'll be called 'The Best' until it ends."

After this shit went crazy on the internet he added "My intention was not to bash Halle, as I specifically said that Halle has NEVER verbally said it. I just wished that when the rumors were out she could've squashed them at that time. I have 3 kids and a wife for 15 years. It was important that my kids knew that their dad didn't do what has been so regularly reported over the years." After this marriage ended Halle said that she was so depressed that she considered suicide. It should also be noted that both her parents, when they were still together before her mother took her and her sister away because the father beat their mother and drank heavily each worked in a psychiatric hospital. That shit has an effect on people. I've worked in a hospital and each time I had to go to 1W my skin crawled.

Four years later there was Eric Benet, a singer and songwriter. This marriage was far more public and confused the world when he was treated for a sex addiction. That is such a vague term. Sometimes it means a guy watches too much porn. Sometimes it means he likes to get a lot of strange. I think this is the one that made me create the HBT since people acted like since she was so hot she couldn't be cheated on. People also started to suspect something was up with her.

Two years later she started dating a French Canadian model named Gabriel Aubry. He was nine years younger than her which made folks think he was doing it for fame. A model? Doing things for fame?! Well shiver me timbers! Fast forward five years and they have a daughter and are separating and she has a new boyfriend she met while filming a movie you will never see. I announced that this would happen as soon as they got together. Then shit hit all the fans. She wanted to bring their daughter to France with her new boyfriend. Next thing you know we get to meet Gabriel Aubry 2.0.

After a citizens arrest, restraining order, another one added on against the other guy, Halle having to pay $16,000 a month in spousal support, $300,000 for lawyer fees to Aubry, and $115,000 retroactively, and accusations of dyeing their daughters hair to make her appear more White this one was finished. Well, as finished as it can be with Halle.

In 2012 Halle and Olivier Martinez confirmed that they were engaged to be married and the doomsday clock ticked closer to midnight. They married in 2013, had a son, and less than a month ago announced that they were separating. No one was surprised. It is a weird separation since there were two petitions filed, each one racing to beat the other. She recently showed up at the premiere for the new film Bond film celebrating Black women of Bond. Isn't there only two? Grace Jones and her? Just checked. I was wrong. Though she is still pretty you can now see that something is up with her.

By next year all the details of this marriage ending will come out and Martinez will be made to look like the devil. But even as I write this I know that by the middle of 2016 she will be dating someone new and engaged by Christmas. She is the crazy girl to the female bad boy. Guys love crazy girls and we have all dated one. Halle will be fine...ish.