Sunday, December 31, 2017

Best Movies Of 2017


This was a rough ass year for movies. I was only able to come up with ten films. Movies were either really awesome or just terrible. This is going to be my list of The Best Movies Of 2017 and you will notice that a lot of them are superhero based ones. That is not my fault. Blame movies just not being good enough or Oscar bait. If I see Tom Hanks, Meryl Streep, Steven Spielberg, or Glenn Close I yawn and say I'll watch it later because I know what is going on. They cram these movies into the end of the year so people go “Oh, this movie is amazing!” meaning “This movie just came out and I remember it!” Let me stop. I'll be ranting about that the closer it gets to the awards. Here is my list. Feel free to disagree and be wrong. All titles are links to my original reviews.


I loved the first John Wick movie and hoped that the sequel would be at least just as good. It was better. This was a cool ass movie that did more of what I liked in the first and expanded on the crazy universe that Wick is a part of. There is supposed to be a third one and I can not wait for it but will be sad when it is done. Here's also hoping to them not letting a series be made or some shit. Keanu Reeves is the only person that could ever play this guy for some reason. This movie has a basic premise executed in the best way possible.


Why do I love these movies so much? The Furious series has gotten to the point where I don't even care what the story is. I just want to see cool cars doing shit that cars are not and can not do in real life. There is a goddamn submarine race against cars. A submarine! I also never thought I'd get to the point in my life where Vin Diesel and I had to choose between Charlize Theron or Michelle Rodriguez. That is a choice that is damn near impossible to make. Damn near. I've made my decision. I chose Helen Mirren.


When I saw the trailer for this I knew I had to see it. Just a bunch of people stuck in a warehouse trying to do a gun deal that goes wrong and for the next ninety minutes just shooting at each other. That is it. With a movie with such a simple idea it is super important for everyone involved to be all in and this cast was. Just when I thought that there was nothing else that could go wrong something did. Just when I thought I figured out what was going to happen to certain people they got their faces shot off. Literally shot off. Cool ass movie that is just fun to watch.


This is not just a best of the year movie, this is just a best movie period. I don't even want to get too deep into this movie because there are still some people that have not seen it. I have talked to some of them and they think this movie is something that it is not just as I did when I saw the trailer. This movie has so many levels and deep meaning to it. It is also a great one to discuss with people afterward and be nervous about that White girl who wants to have you over to meet her parents in the middle of nowhere. Hmm. I am now rethinking one of my crushes.

If you didn't like this or the first movie I don't even wanna talk to you. After shitting on even the fact that this series was being made and then sitting in the theater for both laughing, smiling, cheering, and almost feeling human emotion I am so excited for the third one and to see them in the upcoming Infinity War film. This movie was damn near magic. I have watched it about five times now and it is one of those flicks I can just put on and feel the same way about every time. I appreciated it even more after watching special features and director commentary. There were things I thought were fake that were not and way more work went into this than I gave it credit for.

Fucking loved this movie. It was a Spiderman movie that needed to be made twenty years ago. The only reason I didn't give it a 10 was because of his friend in the film who annoyed me a few too many times. This was a fun movie to see in theaters and I am sure that the next ones will be as fun if not better. This movie did not make the same mistakes of previous Spiderman films. No origin story. No seeing a Uncle Ben slaughtered again. No watching him looking like a grown ass man playing a kid. This guy is young, looks young, and acts young.


While I kinda liked the original movie and never read the book I really enjoyed this movie. It was spooky as shit and Pennywise was horrifying in his ability to continually just keep fucking with these poor kids minds. This movie does not have a slow build because it did not have ten hours to show every single thing that happens. Plus, in all honesty, from what I know about the book like space turtles and gangbangs in the sewer, I am fine with what was left out. Seriously. Gangbangs.


This movie had zero right to be as awesome as it was. From the acting, to effects, to the surprising amount of humor this became my favorite Marvel movie which is shocking considering how much I hated the first two Thor movies. This movie managed to do anything it wanted and made that shit work. They introduced new characters, had a villain that was not ass, and blended into other Marvel movies seamlessly. If you have not seen this because of the other two films be lucky you have not seen them and just dive into this one. All you need to know from previous movies is that Natalie Portman is no longer involved thankfully and Thor gets a haircut.


The first movie I ever considered giving more than a 10/10. I knew that I thought this movie would be cool but holy shit was it more than that. The driving, the music, the story were all that I wanted in this film and more. It was fun and I wanted to see it again as soon as it ended. I have watched the beginning scene available on Youtube at least thirty damn times and bought it as soon as it came out and have watched it a couple more times. No sequel, prequels, or more is needed. I love this movie as is.


And then I broke my own rules and gave this a rating higher than a 10 because goddamn it this movie was perfect. Every year I try to see at least one, hopefully two, movies that make me happy that movies are a thing that exist in our reality. The trailer for this movie does it no justice and I wasn't even all that hype about seeing it. But while in that theater with Cam we were just dumbstruck at how beautiful this was. I was even more shocked when I saw how little it cost to make. For less than a quarter of what some movies spend on advertising this movie managed to be the sweetest, freakiest, fantastic film of the year. It finally got a wide release so there is no reason for you to have not seen this unless you just hate being happy in a room full of strangers that is not an orgy. 

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