Saturday, December 23, 2017

The Review: Bright


Bright 1/10

This movie is a mess. There will be spoilers. I just finished watching the Netflix movie called Bright and am trying to figure out how they could make a movie about orcs living in present times kung fu elves could be this whack. This should not have been a two hour movie. This has so much shit happening and history that it absolutely needed to have been at least a three season show. Will Smith is a cop along with his partner played by Joel Edgerton who is an Orc cop. I guess two thousand years ago Orcs and humans fought together is some great battle but humans still treat Orcs like shit.


In the present day these two are trying to keep evil elves from trying to use a magic wand to bring back a dark lord. Oh, and keep dirty cops, evil Orcs, and gang members from getting it as well. This movie should have been called Miscommunication. No one listens to each other. Everyone just shouts over one another until someone gets shot at. Besides all that other shit being crammed into this there are also fairies, Smith's marriage with his wife and child, the cop Orc trying to be accepted by humans and his own kind, hitman elves, and all the history attached to this that could not possible be explained in two hours.


This id not need to be made. Not sure who it is for or who would really dig this. I couldn't recommend it to anyone. I know people that like magic shit, cop shit, and fighting shit but it doesn't do any of them well enough to say “Hey, check it out.” And please don't get me started on the music used in this. I saw who directed this afterward and thought “Oh, that makes sense” and saw who wrote it and got upset. Oh, god. I just saw how much this cost to make. Get the fuck out of here!

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