Thursday, November 12, 2020

The Review: Star Wars The Force Awakens


Star Wars The Force Awakens 7/10

I liked this movie. Even though I have about eight Star Wars shirts and have made countless images of myself using stuff from the films I did not grow up watching the movies. I waited so long that I watched them in actual order and did not understand why people were such fans after watching Episodes 1-3. I got it a bit more after watching 4-6 but not seeing these as a kid definitely made it harder for me to get wrapped up in. I watched Rogue One and was confused there was no Kylo Ren. Then I watched The Last Jedi and was confused as to why Kylo was already jacked up. Turns out I watched them out of damn order again. So tonight I decided to watch The Force Awakens and either tonight or tomorrow will watch The Rise Of Skywalker and then I'll be done. I watch The Mandalorian so don't come at me with that crazy talk and watch a lot of videos online explaining lore from books, comics, and series. I'm not totally lost when it comes to this stuff. I watch reviews for the films and all I get from fans is that they hate things or love things and hate people who hate what they love. It's weird.



This dude named Poe is talking to this dude and suddenly the First Order shows up and they start killing all the people who live there and he gets captured. There's one Stormtrooper that's like “This shit is terrible!” and he refuses to shoot especially after a Stormtrooper gets killed and wipes the blood all over his helmet. He ends up helping Poe escape but they crash land and they get separated. Poe's droid named BB-8 gets away with a map that shows where Luke Skywalker is. So there's this woman named Rey who gathers junk to get food and instant muffins that look dry as hell. She finds BB-8 and won't sell him for more muffins but everyone is starting to know that it is worth something. She spots Finn and attacks him since BB-8 is a snitch and all “He got my man's jacket!” Finn lies saying he is with the Resistance. They get chased and she hot wires the Millennium Falcon and they get away.



They later get boarded by Han Solo and Chewbacca and immediately attacked by some dudes chasing down Han. Meanwhile Kylo Ren is a lunatic. He is Leia and Han's kid but crazy as fuck and worships his crazy grandfather, Darth Vader. Rey ends up getting a lightsaber that belonged to Luke and starts tripping balls and hearing voices and seeing the past. Lots of things happen and Han faces off with Kylo who ends up putting a damn lightsaber through his chest killing him. Leia feels that shit, talking about how there is still light in his punk ass. Kylo fights against Finn and slices his back and then gets his ass kicked by Rey after mentioning The Force and she don't know about any of that shit. She kicks his ass which explains the scars I saw in the other film. Rey ends up finding Luke and showing him his old lightsaber and he just stares at her. I like Rey and Finn together. I know they don't get together based on the internet and how they want Kylo to be with her because they don't like Black Sex! But seriously, I would love to see and hear about the story of a Stormtrooper leaving and talk about how they were raised and such since there are no clones being used. I'm leaving a lot of shit out.

Harrison Ford as Han Solo

Mark Hamill as Luke Skywalker

Carrie Fisher as General Leia Organa

Adam Driver as Kylo Ren

Daisy Ridley as Rey

John Boyega as Finn

Oscar Isaac as Poe Dameron

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