Sunday, December 8, 2024

The Review: Gremlins 1/2


Gremlins 7/10


Somehow L. and I ended up watching both Gremlin movies. She hadn't seen it since she was little and I hadn't seen it in god knows how many years. This movie was a cute little romp until it just became pure chaos. This inventor named Randall Peltzer goes to a shop in Chinatown after being led there by this little boy. His grandfather runs the place. Randall tries to sell some weird ass invention he has and hears a strange sound. Its a little creature in a box called a Mogwai. The old man doesn't wanna sell it because it is full of responsibilities. Randall offers $200 to buy it and the little boy is like “Take that money!” He ends up meeting Randall outside and selling it to him.



Back home Randall brings the gift to his son Billy. Its a cute ass creature they call Gizmo. The father tells him the rules. Don't expose it to light. Don't let it come in contact with water. And don't feed it after midnight. I think the second rules should be repeated every five minutes because that seems to be the most problematic. So within hours of having Gizmo they blind it with light multiple times and when a kid comes to visit he spills water on it. These little fuzz balls pop out of Gizmo and become more versions of him but evil. One of them, Stripe, has a mohawk and is the ringleader. Billy takes Gizmo to his old science teacher and lets him wet Gizmo to get another gremlin.



One night Billy feeds to gremlins not knowing that their evil asses broke the clock so he didn't know it was after midnight. These monsters turn into slimy cocoons and come out looking all kinds of evil. They break free and start wrecking the small town. Billy's mother got to be one of the most hardcore people in cinema. His mother puts a gremlin in the blender, another in a microwave, and fights one hidden in a Christmas tree. Billy's been fighting too. The whole town is being destroyed and his father shows up after everything is literally on fire.



There is a lot of stuff I left out of this crazy ass movie. I didn't talk about Billy's job, his dog, or the lady he likes. My overall belief is that Gizmo should not exist. The rules for owning him are not hard in theory but no human is responsible enough to own him. When the old man comes and takes him back I was so happy seeing how Billy dealt with it in the few days Gizmo was in his possession. Like, a single damn drop of water can cause more gremlins to appear! At the end of the movie they think the town just went crazy and starting rioting talking about little green men.


Zach Galligan as Billy Peltzer

Phoebe Cates as Kate Beringer

Hoyt Axton as Randall "Rand" Peltzer

Polly Holliday as Ruby Deagle

Frances Lee McCain as Lynn Peltzer

Judge Reinhold as Gerald Hopkins

Dick Miller as Murray Futterman

Glynn Turman as Roy Hanson

Keye Luke as Mr. Wing



Gremlins 2: The New Batch 5/10


This movie starts off with the old man that owns the shop in Chinatown coughing up a lung and then dying after an attempt to be bought out by a developer. Billy and his now fiance Kate (the lady I didn't mention from the first movie) in New York working at that same developers place. Kate does guided tours while Billy designs projects. Gizmo escapes from the shop as it is destroyed and gets captured by some scientists in moments. Oh, and these scientists work in the same building as Billy. Billy hears a delivery guy whistling Gizmo's song and finds out that they have him captured and goes to save him. Billy got Gizmo for a minute and smashes his fingers in a drawer. Gizmo ends up having water spilled on him and some insane looking gremlins pop out. They are all evil. Kate takes who she thinks is Gizmo. Its not. This is the last part of the movie that has any form of coherent story line.



The rest of the movie is a lot of different gremlins with different powers. They take over the building and wreak havoc. There is a smart one, one made of lightning, a spider one, and one that appears to look like how a lot of women want to look these days. Straight up nonsense. The movie starts making fun of itself and the previous film. I thought I had seen this movie but it turns out that I had seen parts of it. Before we watched this I couldn't have told you how Billy came into possession of Gizmo again. Right now I can't even recall where Gizmo went at the end. Think Billy still owns him. He shouldn't.


Zach Galligan as Billy Peltzer

Phoebe Cates as Kate Beringer

John Glover as Daniel Clamp

Robert Prosky as Grandpa Fred

Robert Picardo as Forster

Christopher Lee as Doctor Cushing Catheter

Haviland Morris as Marla Bloodstone

Dick Miller as Murray Futterman

Jackie Joseph as Sheila Futterman

Gedde Watanabe as Mr. Katsuji

Keye Luke as Mr. Wing


Click here for previous The Review.

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