Lady
Cocoa 6/10
This
movie was so fucking weird. I watched Lady Cocoa as I continue to
watch strange ass movies from the 70's with the encouragement of Miss
Jackie. I don't know why she is doing it. Maybe she crazy. I'm doing
it because I do weird shit. This movie is about one of the most
annoying people you have ever seen committed to film having to be
protected and not killed like every instinct in your body would have
you do. Cocoa is in prison for not helping turn on her mobster
boyfriend. She is in jail but has a nice set up going with flowers
and everything. Shit's nice. So she gets released and is supposed to
be under the protection of police. They take her to a hotel in Reno
where all she has to do is wait to testify against her man. She
decides to be a total shit bird every chance she gets. She wants more
clothes. She wants more food. She wants the cop guarding her to
lotion her back and bone her. She wants-wait. What?
There
are two cops. Old White cop with a limp and a Black cop that looks
way too much like her boyfriend. So much so that I looked away for a
minute and got confused like “Why is he talking like that now?!”
Somehow Black cop refrains from choke-slamming Cocoa and she forces
him to take her to dinner where they meet this newly married couple.
The dude loves calling Black cop “brother” and I cringed each
time just like I do in real life. I hate being called brother meaning
bruh-thuh. I don't even let my blood brothers call me brother. Let me
fast forward. That couple turn out to be evil and when Black cop
kills the lady I laughed my ass off at these magical bathroom doors.
They shot at each other like five times from three feet away until he
finally gets her in the stomach and sees her stomach is carved.
Probably means something. I wasn't paying attention I guess.
They
end up on the run and splash in some water and it turns out that that
the White cop is on the take. Son of a bitch! For someone on the take
why would he even bother having Black cop watch over her? There were
some other hitmen that were watching and even tried to shoot Cocoa
but killed a maid instead. Why not just take her to the hotel and
shoot her loud ass face off? Another thing I noticed was there was
another weird ass homosexual stereotype. Let me look at my list of
70's films. Out of the 11 movies I have seen 6 of them had this weird
guy that acted like Snagglepuss. This movie wasn't horrible. There
are scenes you legit can't see because it was so dark and there was
no lighting. I think they could do a remake of this and it could be
good. Check it out on Amazon.
Lola
Falana
Millie
Perkins
Alex
Dreier
Gene
Washington
Joe
Greene
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