Wednesday, August 23, 2017

The Review: The Defenders


The Defenders 2/10

You can't play a Punisher trailer after the wet turd that was The Defenders and expect me to be excited. I just finished forcing myself, yes forcing myself, to finish this first and hopefully last season of The Defenders on Netflix. I don't even know where to start because I have a whole bag of bitching and my gloves are too big to pull them out. Let me start off with what I did like about the show though first. The stuff with Luke Cage was cool. Pre-Defenders stuff. The music was good, the action, the stories. It felt like I was watching a second season of his show which made me happy 'cause I loved the first one so much I proposed to it but it rejected me because I don't have stable employment. Cage, Claire, and Misty Knight are good. But then they decided to go with this wack ass screen wipe to show they were gonna head to another character. Like goddamn Iron Fist.

Ugh. Really don't like the actor playing him. There has been zero growth since his terrible first season. No one told him to stop talking like he was reading fucking fortune cookies every time he opened his mouth. No one believes what he says and its not because of what he is saying, its because of the way he says it. “I...became the..Iron Fist...by...defeating...” Oh, shut your shit! This guy is so annoying to listen to and even worse to watch. Just like in his own season he gets his ass kicked all the time by everyone. I am starting to believe that he never really beat a dragon or maybe the dragon just sucked and was easy to defeat.

I'm not done. This entire season revolved around Iron Fist's bullshit so automatically things get dragged down with him. The Hand, those damned ninjas, need him to open a door so they can get some magical juice so that the Five Fingers of the Hand can keep living forever or being brought back to life. Elektra is there and she is not as annoying at first because she doesn't talk much at the beginning of the season. Every fight Iron Fist gets in he loses. Even when he hits someone with his glow stick they get up pretty quickly. It doesn't end fights and just like before it doesn't always work when he wants or needs it to. He's too tired, nervous, drugged, or his chi isn't centered. He needs a new gimmick.

Daredevil is fine until he gets too into the Elektra stuff. I like how he struggled with not being Daredevil anymore and would have preferred it be a plot point for season three instead of shoehorned into this season. He should also be the new Iron Fist seeing as how he kicked his ass repeatedly. The Matt Murdock stuff was good as well as seeing Foggy and Karen show up and wanting him to stop fighting crime and getting his ass attacked nightly. Liked their stuff. Not enough of it. Jessica Jones was okay. Not really sure how she fit into the team and she felt kind of lost in the shuffle. Cage was the muscles and did cop/detective shit. Daredevil was the martial arts master and law. Jones was there to complain and lift heavy shit sometimes and get drunk and mope. Which means Iron Fist was worthless.

I have this a 2 instead of a 1 just because of the few things I enjoyed about this season and Rosario Dawson as Claire. I am not hoping for a second season of this or Iron Fist. This actually made me not excited about any of these shows returning which I doubt was their goal. There are way too many series out there to think you can get away with making some dull ass shit like this.

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