Melinda
8/10
I was
tricked into watching a real movie! Well, not trick. Miss Jackie has
been watching a bunch of these crazy ass films and suggested I check
this one out. It is called Melinda and was made in 1972. This is
about a radio disc jockey named Frankie J. Parker. By the way, radio
DJ was the job to want even through the 80's. These days people are
made journalists or bloggers. Not decades ago though. DJ's got all
the ass. He goes to take karate lessons and then he gets his ass
kicked and leaves. I was mad because I thought this entire movie was
karate based. I calmed down and continued watching. This lady from
Chicago shows up and her name is Melinda. She meets Frankie at a
nightclub and in his mind he knows he is gonna have the hit 70's sex
with her. He is cocky as hell. So yeah. They have the sex. Some big
ass dude with an afro follows them there and listens to them have the
sex and it looks like it is so good that he climaxes just from
hearing it.
The
next day Frankie returns home and her ass is dead. The cops come and
rough up Frankie but he gets out of custody. While driving around
this chick says her car isn't working and can he drop her off. He
agrees with the look of sex in his eyes. She pulls out a gun and he
speeds up the car and slams on the brakes making her...dizzy. He
brings her to his place and she says she ain't saying anything. He
slaps her around and she says she was told to bring him to a spot and
that's it. She runs to the ocean and he beach slaps her and leaves
her. So she ends up dead. Now he got two dead women on his hands!
This evil old dude wants something that he thinks Frankie has that
Melinda was carrying. Turns out Melinda is named Audrey and she was
his mistress.
Frankie
puts the life of his ex Terry's life in danger by asking her to get
something out of a security box that belongs to the dead woman. It is
a gold cigarette case. That's it. This dude named Tank who Frankie
was cool with works for Mitch so when Frankie needed information he
would just slap him up a bit. They don't show this clearly, but it
turns out that in the case was a tape recording of Mitch monologuing
his evil plan that got someone assassinated. Terry ends up kidnapped
and put in a cage with snakes. Frankie gets his karate friends to
come and they start doing some of the worst choreographed fight
scenes you will witness. People get kicked right and fly left. By the
way, everyone knows karate. One dude gets shot in the shin and that
was some of the best acting I have ever seen period. When he went
down I believed that shit.
So
Frankie makes his way back to Mitch's place and kicks his ass. He
literally kicks, bitch slaps, punches, karate kicks, dick kicks, and
flips his ass all over his own house. The disrespect! He starts
drowning him until his karate teacher tells him that's enough and
leaves. Oh, one scene that made me say “Shut your damn mouth!”
was when Frankie karate kicked the lock off the snake cage and Terry
started screaming at the top of her lungs. There is a sniper in the
window! There is this weird thing in these movies where they have a
super flamboyant dude for whatever reason. I ended up finding this on
Youtube. Like the whole damn movie. It is kinda long because there
are a lot of shots that just drag on. And I imagine there was barely
a budget for music because there are some scenes where you just hear
stock screaming and punches that sound like someone dropped a melon.
Calvin
Lockhart as Frankie J. Parker
Rosalind
Cash as Terry Davis
Vonetta
McGee as Melinda
Paul
Stevens as Mitch
Rockne
Tarkington as Tank
Ross
Hagen as Gregg Van
Renny
Roker as Dennis Smith
Judyann
Elder as Gloria
Jim
Kelly as Charles Atkins
Jan
Tice as Marcia
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