The
First Purge 2/10
This
movie is stuuuuuuupid. I knew that going in. I have seen all of The
Purge films (click here, here, and here for those reviews) and knew
that I would wait a bit before seeing The First Purge. Now, one of my
biggest problems with this movie is that it seems way more
technologically advanced than the movies that take place over ten
years and more later. This starts off with this crackhead named
Skeletor talking about his need to be violent and “purge” while
being interviewed. How did he hear about this interview process by
the way? What in the fuck did that waiting room look like?! If the Purge had a face it would look like his. Other
people are interviewed and told that they will get $5,000 and a
tracking device to monitor their shit. It comes in the form of eye
contacts that glow which is silly as shit but whatever. Another
problem I had is the creation of the Purge is rushed at the start of
this.
It is
the same problem I have with Terminator sequels. With those I want to
see the day after SkyNet awakens and how people react, not years
later when there are robots the size of buildings on wheels fighting
the last of humanity. With this I wanted to see what led to the
actual first purge and the creation of the New Founding Fathers or
America. This blows past that and goes “The first Purge is about to
start so...yeah.” It is televised and set on Staten Island. The
program created by someone with dumb intentions that gets dumber
results named Dr. May Updale. She and her team, including a guy that
is far too obviously dubious, sit and watch the feeds of the Purge.
There
is this chick that is against the Purge and protests even though it
means nothing because the shit is happening and centered in her
neighborhood because the shit is so bad that there is a need to
create a free killing and crime program only there. She has a younger
brother that you know is gonna cause some trouble because he never
closes his mouth. Not that he doesn't talk. I just have a problem
with people whose bottom lip never shuts. He heads out just to find
Skeletor and even after getting his sisters throat cut by the fucker
can not kill him. There is also a drug kingpin who should for sure be
the next Black Panther, Blade, or Mr. Terrific. The Purge begins and
Skeletor gets the first one. He stalks he city and ends up at a party
during the Purge and starts killing people because hardly anyone is.
Even the research team is getting pissed that no one is killing. They
start sending in mercenaries and Klansmen to just straight up kill
people.
A team
of victims that are out in the street when they absolutely should not
be need to be saved. The drug kingpin becomes the hero because
goddamn it if anyone is gonna kill the community it's gonna be him!
After the team of victims end up back home and in danger because
teams are straight up kicking open doors and slaughtering folks he
goes full Rambo and starts taking them out. There is animated blood
all over the place at this point. The bad guys start spraying
cartoons when they are killed. There is a Black lady they have there
for humor and it so does not fit. She is talking about shitting and
asthma when people in her building are being literally massacred.
“What the fuck is really going on I'm confused.” Why did she even
say that? I will just assume bad editing. Skeletor ends up wandering
into the building they are in fighting for their lives like some
kinda rude sitcom neighbor and with a machete kills like three
soldiers before being killed. The drug kingpin gets shot and moments
later the sun is up! Moments!!! The Purge is over and a success. I
guess.
Judging
by how stupid this first Purge was there never would have been
another one. It is not like everyone that participated was killed.
There are a lot of hurt people and some with injuries that will
require medical care for the rest of their lives. If they have the
ability to stage this shit and set it up for poor people of color in
areas they want cleared out why not just get these same militias and
shit to just go on any day of the week and kill? The smokescreen of a
Purge makes no sense. This movie could have been so much better. With
the previous ones they kept coming close to being decent but this one
took a massive step backwards.
Y'lan
Noel as Dmitri
Lex
Scott Davis as Nya
Joivan
Wade as Isaiah
Mugga
as Dolores
Christian
Robinson as Capital A
Lauren
Vélez as Luisa
Kristen
Solis as Selina
Marisa
Tomei as Dr. May Updale/The Architect
Rotimi
Paul as Skeletor
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