Theater Whore: Divergent

Divergent 2/10

I took one for the team again. I decided to check out this movie Divergent even though there are far better films out to see right now but I'm waiting until later this week to check them out. I have not read the books and I am glad because then I can't get upset about what was left out or added. As someone going in blind I have to say that this movie was pretty damned bad. Before I start ranting I should probably say what the movie is about, right?

"Seriously, who are you? You can't be the chick on the poster."

Set in the future where the world looks bland and fucked over (as usual) a girl named Beatrice “Tris” Prior played by Shailene Woodley has to choose what she wants to do with her life. There are different factions and she chooses one that shocks her family even though in reality she is a Divergent which means she won't really belong to any of the factions. She chooses what appears to be the douche faction called Dauntless. They are living breathing Mountain Dew commercials.

Tris spends all her time looking confused or starring at this guy named Four. Immediately I know that there will be a romance shoehorned into this tale and sighed. As the owner of a penis there is nothing about this chick that would make him risk his life for her the way he does. If anything I'd be after Zoe Kravitz. She is funny and has some form of a personality. And she is super tiny. She's like if sexy came in bite size.

So Tris messes up on every challenge she comes against and has to be saved constantly so of course that means she's the hero. She ends up as part of a revolution where her mom and her are taking out soldiers whose life work is to hunt and kill people! This isn't something they were recruited into or tried out to raise enough money to buy a truck. This is their life! She and mom take a bunch of 'em out, mama gets merc'd, and she tearfully runs away. The soldiers gave her time to mourn though which made me laugh. Oh, I gotta point out the running. You know that run you do when the microwave beeps when food is done? Its not quite a run, its definitely not a sprint, but it isn't exactly slow. Its more of a saunter. She saunters away from bullets.

Creeper...

This movie stank. I know that this is supposed to be another one of those kick ass movies for young girls to give them a heroine to look up to. Nope. Other films like Twilight and Hunger Games trick girls into thinking this is what strong young women act like. There are strong women and girls in Game Of Thrones, the movies Hanna, Let The Right One In, almost anything with Milla Jovovich, Serenity, Aliens, of even fucking Xena. These new films are pretty much girl gets into trouble, guy saves her, she struggles between two men, picks one, throws a punch or two, then gets saved. Stop making these. What's that? There are two more of these coming out?!

Well...shit.

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