Sunday, December 26, 2010

Theater Whore: True Grit


True Grit is a remake of an old John Wayne film with the same title. No, I’ve never seen the original and have no desire to. I don’t have an Public Enemy type hatred of the guy. But at this point in my life he is more of a character of himself than anything else. I also trusted the great actors in this film to bring something new to the table and didn’t want to be influenced in any way. This version was directed be the Coen Brothers (O Brother, Where Art Thou?, No Country For Old Men, Fargo) and I loved everything they did with it.

Hallie Seinfeld (Son of Tuscon) stars as Mattie Ross, a young girl whose father was murdered for some gold coins and a horse. She arrives in this small town and spends the night sleeping in the mortuary with her father and three other men she sees hung for various crimes. She is a very smart child with fantastic bargaining skills. She hires Jeff Bridges (The Big Lebowski, Tron, Iron Man, The Men Who Stare At Goats) playing Rooster Cogburn, an alcoholic, chain smoking bounty hunter to track the man who killed her father for $50. Reluctantly he agrees.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Theater Whore: Megamind


I wasn’t too excited to see this film. I already knew that the animation wasn’t the kind I liked. Listen to me already bitching before I even name the damned movie. It’s funny because after watching for about five minutes I said to myself “This could have easily been a cheaper animated series or a live action film.” The way it looked seemed really flat at times.

Megamind stars Will Ferrell (Talladega Nights, Anchorman, Blades Of Glory) as, uh, Megamind. He is a villain that crashed to Earth only to land in a prison and taught that being good was bad. Brad Pitt (Troy, Fight Club, Mr. & Mrs. Smith) is Metro Man, also someone who crashed to Earth but landed with a rich family and grew up with everything that he wanted. These two grow up together and begin a rivalry that lasts for decades.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Theater Whore: Due Date


I watched Due Date and laughed my ass off. I have been hearing a lot of people talking trash about this film and I don’t appreciate it. It was funny, damn you. It’s from the same guy (Todd Phillips) who directed The Hangover (which I hated) and Old School (which I loved). So this seems to be the film that is drawing a line in the sand apparently.

The film stars Robert Downey Jr. (Iron Man, Sherlock Holmes, Tropic Thunder) as a guy who is trying to get home to see his wife give birth for the very first time. But there’s a problem. It starts with a car door being knocked off and ends with him on a no fly list. The cause of most of the drama in this film is Zach Galifianakis (The Hangover, Dinner For Schmucks). Knowing that they are both heading to Los Angeles Downey decides to ride with this mad man. Now he isn’t mad in a crazy sense, but he is fucking loony. Oh, and he has his little dog and his fathers ashes in a coffee cup.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

TV Slut: The Walking Dead


I was finally able to watch The Walking Dead that debuted on AMC Halloween night. I had read the comic book but gave up on it due to the slow developing story, the lateness of the issues, and the art that seemed to become lazy. This is the problem I have with most comics so when I hear that one is being made into a movie, especially one that isn’t done, I worry. In this case my worries were unfounded.

The series starts off with Officer Rick Grimes and his partner Shane Walsh talking about issues in their respective relationships only to be interrupted by a call to assist in a high speed chase. Grimes is shot by one of the assailants and awakens in the hospital after an unknown amount of time. He stumbles through then hospital finding bodies strewn about, a door that contains “The Dead” and body bags littering the parking lot outside of the hospital. Grimes makes his way home to find it empty (his wife Lori and his son Carl either dead or gone) after confronting half a corpse that moans at him.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Theater Whore: Saw 3D


This is a fucked up film. Let me get that out of the way first. I started watching all of the Saw films back in 2008 which is a lot of gore to cram in over a weekend. I’m not a fan of many new horror films. Most of them are just a bunch of unlikable assholes that you don’t care about when they die. Back in the day (no, wait, don’t walk away!) there were nerds, sluts, jocks, assholes, and the Black dude. Lots of characters. Now no one is worth cheering for. Look at Human Centipede. I didn’t care that those girls got their faces sewn to assholes (literally) and made to march and eat poop.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Theater Whore: Red


Last week I had to pleasure of hanging out at The Grove here in Los Angeles and seeing the newest Bruce Willis action film Red. To be completely honest, I really didn’t want to see this movie. I’d heard bad reviews from sites I respected and heard that it veered very far off from the comic book that it was based off of. After being burned by terrible comic book based films like Wanted I had decided not to waste my time or money on this film. Damn, I’m glad I was talked into seeing this.

Monday, October 18, 2010

TV Slut: No Ordinary Family



This show has suffered from the same problem many other super hero based television shows have but in record time. Too many people with powers. The show starts with this family that doesn’t seem to get along all that well. Everyone in the house is distant or in a hurry to get away from each other. While on a trip in a bionic ass storm they crash land into the sea and everyone survives but the pilot. They arrive home and everything is business as usual.

Friday, October 15, 2010

Theater Whore: Scott Pilgrim, The Expendables, & Machete

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World

This was a film based in Toronto (Canada not California) and directed by Edgar Wright (Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz) who is an awesome director. It stars Michael Cera (Superbad, Juno) as Scott Pilgrim, a guy who plays in a band called Sex Bob-Omb. He falls for a chick named Ramona Flowers (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) after she passes through one of his dreams. She can do it because she is American and they don’t do this in Canada.