Saturday, February 27, 2016

Theater Whore: The Big Short


The Big Short 3/10

I watched The Big Short. And...that's it. Has a great cast of people that tend to just shout at each other. Imagine Wolf Of Wallstreet but with more DiCaprio's. Its about the government and banks using people and collapsing back in 2008. I didn't really learn anything new from this and when they tried to have actors, actresses, or singers suddenly pop up and explain it that made things more confusing because they were speaking so fast and trying to seem cool. I did discover that Margot Robbie has an accent and that Selena Gomez looks even more like a child in a casino setting. Very confused as to why this was nominated for a best picture, best director, or any of its other nominations. This movie was like walking into a room full of cool people that didn't want to talk to you.

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Thursday, February 25, 2016

Theater Whore: Bridge Of Spies


Bridge Of Spies 4/10

Um...that was definitely a film. I finally got around to watching Bridge Of Spies starring Tom Hanks. Its not a terrible movie but its just a series of things happening that could barely hold my attention. It looks nice. The direction was good. But it was rather dull. Its based off the true story of...whatever. I honestly don't care to recap what it was about. I'm shocked that this was nominated for best picture though when I can think of maybe five more that weren't that were far more entertaining. This is not the kind of film I would ever watch again unless I just wanted sound in my place. I felt every minute of the almost two and a half hours.

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Sunday, February 14, 2016

The Review: Roar


Pardon my French but les gens sont stupides et fous! I just finished watching the 1981 film Roar. I can't remember the last time a movie made me so damned nervous. Just lions, cheetahs, tigers, and a few elephants thrown in because people didn't seem terrified enough. My god. I mean...my god. This movie is about this guy named Hank that is taking car of a bunch of wild ass animals. One day while he is gone his family shows up and all hell breaks loose. He also has this poor Black guy that looks ready to shit himself in every scene. There is not a single scene where a giant cat is not biting or climbing on someone.


There are some scenes that try to be funny but you can only laugh so much when you see people actually bleeding on camera. The end credits are hilarious because the animals look all cute and peaceful while they hold them and feed the babies. No! This guys family almost got mauled to death and when he finally gets back home its all like “Oh, you guys can stay a while longer!” He's insane! Everyone is insane! That being said I'd recommend this movie to everyone because there is no way in hell a movie like this would ever be made again.

Friday, February 12, 2016

Theater Whore: Deadpool


Deadpool 10/10

There will be some spoilers. I went to see Deadpool this morning. Yes. This morning. I went to the 10am showing at The Arclight over on Sunset. Could I have waited until later in the day? Or the weekend? No! Sunday they are doing that damned marathon and since it is Valentine's Day I'll be here spending the day with the woman I am deeply in love with. Kidding! I'm barely loved by folks. This movies stars Ryan Reynolds as Deadpool/Wade Wilson, Morena Baccarin as Vanessa, Ed Skrein as Ajax, T. J. Miller as Weasel , Gina Carano as Angel Dust, Brianna Hildebrand as Negasonic Teenage Warhead, Stefan Kapičić as Colossus, and Leslie Uggams as Blind Al.

Monday, February 8, 2016

Theater Whore: Spotlight


Spotlight 7/10

I finally got a chance to watch Spotlight after hearing about how good it was for so long. It has a huge cast with Mark Ruffalo, Michael Keaton, Rachel McAdams, John Slattery, Stanley Tucci, Liev Schreiber, and Billy Crudup. This is based off of the news team that covered the true events that led to it being publicly known that a lot of Catholic priests were diddling children, not just boys, and covering it all up back in 2001. If shit got too hot they would just transfer them to another location or just pay the victims off. It sucked.