The Review: Roar

Pardon my French but les gens sont stupides et fous! I just finished watching the 1981 film Roar. I can't remember the last time a movie made me so damned nervous. Just lions, cheetahs, tigers, and a few elephants thrown in because people didn't seem terrified enough. My god. I mean...my god. This movie is about this guy named Hank that is taking care of a bunch of wild ass animals. One day while he is gone his family shows up and all hell breaks loose. He also has this poor Black guy that looks ready to shit himself in every scene. There is not a single scene where a giant cat is not biting or climbing on someone.

There are some scenes that try to be funny but you can only laugh so much when you see people actually bleeding on camera. The end credits are hilarious because the animals look all cute and peaceful while they hold them and feed the babies. No! This guys family almost got mauled to death and when he finally gets back home its all like “Oh, you guys can stay a while longer!” He's insane! Everyone is insane! That being said I'd recommend this movie to everyone because there is no way in hell a movie like this would ever be made again.

Theater Whore: Automata

Automata 2/10

Well...that was a movie. Automata is about a guy that works for a robotics company that is trying to figure out why they are acting in ways they shouldn't. It looked like it would be a cool movie from the trailer but, wow, this movie was dull. If it were a show you wouldn't watch it. It just drags, is far too predictable, and there is nothing original about it. It stars Antonio Banderas, Dylan McDermott, and Melanie Griffith who stops in for some coffee. This movie is an idea that cold have been made but not executed. The director and writers (which he was one of) had nothing to say.

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