American
Gods “The Bone Orchard” 10/10
There
will be spoilers. I have wanted to watch this series American Gods
ever since I heard it was being made. I loved the book (never read
the follow ups which I will do this summer) and when I saw the
trailer for this I knew they had gone all out. It stars Ricky Whittle
as a newly released prisoner named Shadow Moon. He was arrested for
assault a while back but is being released a few days early. He is
told that he is getting out but its a few days beforehand because his
wife was killed. He has some flashbacks of another prisoner telling
him stories and life tips that will later become useful.
While
waiting for his plane he sees an old man close to losing it get
bumped to first class. He later boards and and he himself gets first
class seating right across from the old man. He calls himself Mr.
Wednesday and he is played by Ian McShane. He knows a lot of
information about Shadow and offers him a job. Shadow declines. He
just wants to go to his wife's funeral. At a bar he meets Mr.
Wednesday once again and a guy that claims to be a leprechaun named
Mad Sweeney played by Pablo Schreiber. He wants to fight Shadow and
teach him his gold coin trick if he wins. Shadow chooses not to until
Sweeney starts talking that shit about Shadow's wife.
Meanwhile
this fine ass woman named Bilquis played by Yetide
Badaki meets this old guy on a date. He
says his kids convinced him to try online dating an he can't believe
he lucked out and found her. Hell, I'd try online dating too if women
looking and acting like her showed up! He tries to take it slow but
she is having none of that shit and has him on top of her, then she
gets on top of him and makes him worship her. She slowly starts
growing, he is not freaking out and is in some kinda trance.
Eventually she shoves him right up in her vajayjay. Yep. Just...right
on up in there.
Shadow
makes it to his wife's funeral and it is a mess. Her friend is there
drunk as a skunk and telling Shadow how his wife died with her
husbands dick in her mouth! Shadow of course had no idea being in
jail and all. Even after she gets buried and Shadow is trying to have
a moment she shows up and keeps talking shit about is wife and her
husband. She pissed on his grave and now wants to fuck on top of it.
Shadow declines much to her chagrin. While walking he spots some
weird ass device to leaps onto his head and puts him in some weird
virtual reality where he is questioned by a synthetic frog smoking
kid named Technical Boy played by Bruce Langley.
After
being kicked to shit by a bunch of faceless men and hung from a tree
Shadow is saved by someone who turns these guys into meat. One of
them is split from the bottom up down the middle. Shadow doesn't know
who saved him and neither do I because that is how the episode ended.
I will be checking out this show every week. I am spoiled from being
able to just plow through a season in one or two days. Its gonna take
some getting used to waiting every week for this one.
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