DVDiculous: Dragon Eyes

I was trolling Youtube earlier tonight and saw that there was this movie called Dragon Eyes starring Cung Le who is one of the most entertaining MMA fighters, Jean-Claude Van Damme, and Peter Weller aka Robocop. After watching the trailer I was like “I am compelled to watch this.” This is one of those films that make me miss 80’s action movies. Just a straight forward story and brutal fights. My god the fights were brutal. The director, John Hyams, is obviously a huge fan of Guy Ritchie.

Ryan Hong (three guesses who is playing him) is in prison just minding his business. He ends up getting his ass kicked for no damned reason when suddenly JCVD aka Tiano comes out of left field, whips this dudes ass, and walks back to the fence like nothing happened. He and Hong are cellmates and Tiano starts training Hong to fight. His training is hard as hell but it pays off.

Somebody's gonna be peeing blood.

Hong is having flashbacks of chasing a guy who accidentally shoots a woman to death. Hong blames himself for her murder but Tiano tells him that he needs to let that shit go. Hong gets out of jail and moves to this neighborhood called St. Jude Square where he meets his new neighbors, the 6th St. Gang. He goes upstairs, gets a place to stay, and immediately gets into a fight.

He beats the shit out of these guys. Look at him helping them into their car.

Helpful!

The Blackers and Latino gang members start getting picked off and robbed and Mr. V doesn’t appreciate that shit. After whipping both gangs Hong is arrested and gets into another fight with this crazy ass dude named Lord. Hong meets Mr. V and hires him since he knows how good he is. Mr. V is a cop…I think and has everyone under his thumb.

Comply.

Hong meets his landords daughter and she is hot but her dad is like “You don’t know this crazy fucker!” and she’s all like “Dude, do you see the choice of men I have in this neighborhood?!” and he’s all “I don’t want him here he’s gonna start shit!” and she’s “We live on a street full of drug dealers and Hong whips their asses so bad they now wave to him!” So yeah. That’s how I heard it and the reason why I will never write a film that gets made.

"I'll let you direct me, Dante..."

The streets get cleaned, Hong is running shit, and Mr. V hires him to kill a guy. Hong pretends to and ends up stealing Mr. V’s money from his home. Meanwhile we get some more flashbacks of Hong training. Hong tells the gangs that they will not be carrying guns anymore. Later Hong gets captured for stealing and gets the living hell beat out of himself. He survives and escapes and gathers the gangs since the dude Hong fought in jail, Lord, is running shit now.

Hong goes all Enter The Dragon and fights a bunch of dudes. Next thing you know there’s a Mexican standoff and people start dying all over the place. The way the movie ends is kinda weird but I’m not complaining. This was a cool film and I’d definitely watch it again.