Saturday, May 19, 2018

Theater Whore: Deadpool 2



Deadpool 2 – 10/10

You should only read this if you have already seen Deadpool 2 or have no desire to anytime soon and don't mind spoilers because I will be spoiling the shit out of this movie. There will be no things I didn't like because this was awesome as fuck and everyone involved needs to be proud of themselves for making a movie that forced me to contain my laughter. I loved the first movie and this one was better for me in every sense. From action, story, and humor. There were also a ton of surprises that I'll spoil the fuck out of so if you don't wanna know stop reading now.


This takes place a few years after the first movie and Deadpool is living the life. He is a mercenary being paid to kill people which he loves doing. During one insane ass mission he misses killing one guy because he locks himself in a safe room which pisses Deadpool off. He ends up heading home late for his anniversary with Vanessa. She tells him that she wants to have a baby with him and everything is so nice and sweet until some guys barge in and start lighting the place up with bullets. And Deadpool fails to stop him. Vanessa is shot dead and Deadpool races downstairs, catches the guy, and lets a car hit the both of them. By the way, Deadpool can be terrifying when he is upset.


The movie reverses back to the start because it begins with him setting to blow his house up. I thought it was because Vanessa left him, not that she was killed. He blows himself to pieces and Colossus shows up and takes him back to the X-Men mansion. Negasonic Teenage Warhead is there along with her girlfriend Yukio are also there. Negasonic doesn't do too much in this movie just like in the first which is disappointing. I like Yukio and Deadpool's weird little greetings with one another. Colossus wants Deadpool to join the team and Deadpool once again mocks the fact that no other X-Men are there...until a door closes and most of the fucking X-Men team are in the room! I was like “What the fuck did I just see?!”


The team shows up at a mutant reeducation center where this kid named Russell aka Firefist is in a standoff with police. Deadpool tries to relate to the kid, talk to him, a fight ensues, and next thing you know Deadpool has shot one of the employees and he and the kid are arrested and taken to this place called the Icebox. They have these collars put on that negate their mutant abilities. Now Deadpool is just a guy that is riddled with cancer eating his body up and killing him inside a prison with criminals like Black Tom Cassidy. Seriously. He is just the start of mutants that appear and shocked the fuck out of me. Next thing you know Cable arrives.


By this point I had actually forgot that Cable was in this movie. I was so into this that I forgot the plot. In the future Cable is standing over the body of ashen corpses. He turns a dial and travels back in time. He starts hunting who I think is Deadpool until you find out that he is trying to kill Firefist. Deadpool wants nothing to do with the kid who keeps trying to attack folks with a pen he keeps in his “prison pocket.” 


He wants to be a badass and ends up becoming friends with “the beast.” I don't wanna spoil who it is but when this character shows up in the flesh it was so hard for me not to start cheering. Deadpool and Cable end up exploding out of the prison. Deadpool seems dead again and has a vision of Vanessa and tries to interpret what she is saying to him.


Deadpool is convinced that he needs a team. He and Weasel post an ad for a new team and the people that show up are Domino who needs her own movie. She is such a badass. I won't even get into how I want her to be my new friend. This guy named Peter that just saw the ad and thought it would be fun. This guy is incredible. Shatterstar fucking shows up! A guy named Bedlam appears. And The Vanisher. I never thought I would laugh so hard at a empty parachute flying through the sky. 


Oh, I almost forgot about Zeitgeist. These are real characters from the comics. Their first mission is a fucking disaster! I won't say what happens but I could not stop laughing. This then leads to one of the coolest high speed chases ever filmed. I seem to say that every year or two, but the shit is for real. Domino has some of the coolest moments.


At this point I am gonna stop talking about the movie because I have spoiled some stuff but there is so much more to say and I want you bastards to go see this. This is better than the first film and Ryan Reynolds needs to be congratulated for making one of the best superhero movies. I heard some review where they got tired of the fourth wall stuff but I loved it and it led to one of the best scenes in this movie at the end. 


This movie tops everything from the first and the cast is amazing and perfect in their parts. Josh Brolin, Morena Baccarin, Julian Dennison, Zazie Beetz, T.J. Miller, Brianna Hildebrand, Stefan Kapičić, as well as Leslie Uggams as Blind Al and Karan Soni as Dopinder. If you are not squeamish and love laughing like a damned fool see this movie.

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