Gossip And Shit: 3/28/18

Rapper DMX got sentenced to one year in prison for tax evasion. He has been doing all kinds of shit since being let out like being drunk as shit after being released. After one year he will have three years of supervision. He's too old for that shit. He plead guilty to one count of 14 which would have sent him to prison for 44 years. He's 47 years old so let's just say that would have been life.

Stephen Belafonte wants Mel B to stop brainwashing their daughter. I want her to stop having this image that is decades old from keeping me awake. Look at Baby Spice back there trying...

Rosa Salazar of American Horror Story had a restraining order filed against her by her ex boyfriend who says she showed up to his house at midnight and screamed at him. She also threatened to say he hit her which made him call the cops. Good move, dude! She now has to stay 100 yards from him.

Jeremy Meeks aka Hot Felon got his billionaire girlfriend pregnant. Yeah, he cheated on his wife and abandoned their child. But his eyes tho...

Tommy Lee has kinda made up with his son Brandon Lee after he was knocked out by him but the battery charge still exists.

Kevin Federline celebrated his 40th birthday at a strip club in Vegas. It is not a good look. You have no idea how afraid I am of being the old dude trying to look young. 

Bill Cosby is going to trial and Janice Dickinson will be testifying against him. She says he drugged and raped her in 1982. For anyone that says that was a long time ago you are humaning wrong.

It seems Prince had “exceedingly high” levels of fentanyl in his system when he died. 69 micrograms per kilogram are considered an overdose and he had 450. Some doctors need to have their licenses taken away.

Former Teen Mom star/current porn actress Farrah Abraham and MTV have settled their beef regarding her suing them for sex shaming her.

Corey Feldman was stabbed with a small object after having his car door yanked open at a red light by an erratic driver that tailed him. Lock your doors, America. I still never understand why people drive with their doors not locked. And his security guard needs another occupation.

Police at Coachella are training for a possible massacre. Know what? As much as I would like to stare at Beyonce's legs in person I am not a fan of having SWAT on standby while I do it. Speaking of Bey, someone bit her and the rumors regarding who it is is more interesting than the actual answer to me.

Monique Greene checked into a hospital after a friend was concerned about her emotional well being after she accused Nelly of raping her. I'm surprised her name was ever released.

Ultra pervert Jared Fogle wants to be released from prison and wants a pardon from the president. Nah...

Alleged rapper XXXTentacion was recently granted a release from house arrest and immediately someone posted a video of him hitting a girl. His lawyer says that the hitting was in “jest.” People need to stop jesting so much.

Groupon has some shoes in Ni**er Brown if you want. Of course they issued an apology. “We are appalled that this language was displayed on our site...this is completely unacceptable and violates our policies - to say nothing of our values.” Tiffany Haddish is their new spokeswoman. Let's see how this goes.

Some fireworks went off and into the crowd at a recent Monster Jam! Two adults were hurt hurt hurt! But the kid were not harmed harmed harmed!

Virginia Tech's women's lacrosse team got into some shit online after they filmed themselves singing rapper Lil Dicky's song Freaky Friday. Particularly a verse where Lil Dicky in Chris Brown's body (just watch the video it is funny as hell) says “Wonder if I can say the n-word. Wait, can I really say the n-word? What up, my nigga? What up, my nigga? Big ups, my nigga. We up, my nigga. You pussy ass nigga. Man, fuck y'all niggas, 'cause I'm that nigga. Nigga, nigga, nigga, I'm that nigga!”

Their head coach John Sung said “This is a teachable moment. It's not something that we're proud of. The team is very apologetic and sorry. There's nobody of any color that should say it. Period. There's nobody that should say it...They just thought that they were singing along to a song. They had just won. They're singing songs. The first couple songs were Disney songs...They were celebrating and they were dancing and they were excited.” Or...dumb ass kids that thought that it was totally fine to sing those lyrics and record it because they have Black friends. Back home. I mean, look at all this diversity! And I hate the phrase teachable moment. Fucking hate it.

NutriBullet is in trouble for burning a lady's face. She was making hummus and the shit exploded and jacked her up. I on the other hand love my Nutribullet. It is small, powerful, and gets the job done. If my dick were a product it would be the Nutribullet. Sponsor me!

Stormy Daniels says she spanked Donald Trump after they had sex in 2006. Ew! Ew! Ew!

Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber are not a thing. Again. Give them another year. Oh, I almost forgot. Bieber got rear ended a few days ago.

Here is Helen Mirren twerking.