"Bad Mamma Jamma": Cate Blanchett

A while ago I was getting pictures ready trying to figure out who was going to be the next Bad Mamma Jamma. I've mentioned before that it has gotten more difficult to do because women will usually just be used for jewelry to a guy in a movie or TV show. Its hard to find a woman that fits all the criteria for a BMJ. But a few months back I found one and am just now writing about her. This weeks BMJ is Cate Blanchett.

Born in Australia to an Australian mother and Texan father she described herself as being part extrovert part wallflower as a child. I don't even know how that is possible with a mother born in the scariest country on Earth and a father from the now second scariest state in America. One would assume she runs around at 10 all the time. She studied fine arts and economics before saying “Fuck it” and traveling.

"Bad Mamma Jamma": Jodie Foster

In my never ending search for Bad Mamma Jamma's I find that I keep having to look to the past. I've gotten suggestions from friends and readers but the problem is that the women they mention have done one or two cool ass roles and disappeared and that's it. Otherwise I would include the little girl from Let The Right One In, Kick Ass, or even Pippi Longstocking. So I looked through movies I've seen starring women and the choice for today's BMJ ended up being obvious. I present to you, Jodie Foster!

Born in Los Angeles, CA, Foster ended up going to Yale but left due to some psychopath who shot Ronald Reagan who was obsessed with her. She went back after a semester. Before she even went to college she was in a shit ton of films and television like Taxi Driver, Bugsy Malone, Gunsmoke, and Saturday Night Live. She was nominated for some of these films being the youngest at the time to do so.

"Bad Mamma Jamma": Lena Headey

Just like the problem I have had coming up with a Bad Ass Mofo I have been having the same problems coming up with a new Bad Mamma Jamma. I think I have close to 40 BAM's and less than 20 BMJ's. There are a set list of things that will make someone a BMJ in my eyes and though it took a while for me to realize it, Lena Headey is definitely one!

Born in Hamilton, Bermuda and raised in England Headey is one of those actresses that don't always have to play off her looks to do her job well. She's someone I had seen many times and didn't know she was the same damned person. She was in The Brother's Grimm (which was how Hansel & Gretel should've been) and 300. Still, I didn't know this was the same person.

"Bad Mamma Jamma": Julianne Moore

Known for being one of the most versatile actresses going Julianne Moore is this weeks Bad Mamma Jamma! Can you believe she is 52 and looks better than most actresses in their 20’s? Don’t even get me started on talent levels. I’d wreck it. And by it I mean her…ironing board. What did you think I was talking about? Really? Wow. Just when you think you know someone. Born Julie Anne Smith to a paratrooper father and psychiatrist and social worker mother, she bounced around the country not staying at one place for long. Except my bed. What?

Moore got her start on As The World Turns for which she won multiple awards before moving on to films like The Hand That Rocks The Cradle, The Gun In Betty Lou’s Handbag, The Fugitive, Nine Months, and of course Boogie Nights where she was nominated for a shit ton of awards. That same year she starred in The Lost World: Jurassic Park where she helped prove that dinosaurs are fucked up. The next year she was in one of my favorite films of all time The Big Lebowski.

"Bad Mamma Jamma": Tilda Swinton

This weeks Bad Mamma Jamma is a woman who in one second can seem super vulnerable and helpless and then the next be one of the scariest damned women you’ve ever seen in film. Tilda Swinton is this weeks BMJ! Born Katherine Mathilda Swinton in London, England she has been in tons of films and here in the U.S is known as Cate Blanchett. Come on! I cant be the only person to mix the two of them up! I hope she doesn’t see this because she could probably kick my ass even at the age of 52.

After college she started off in small theaters groups and foreign films before making it big here in films like The Beach, Vanilla Sky, and of course as the Ice Queen in the Chronicle’s Of Narnia films where she was super evil and scary. She beat up lion Jesus and wore his damned fur! How evil is that? Seriously. I need to know. I got a pair of scissors and the L.A Zoo is a bus ride away.

"Bad Mamma Jamma": Pam Grier

Its taken me so damned long to find a Bad Mamma Jamma for this week. I checked and my last one was in January of this year. That is ridiculous. Now, there are some young girls that are kicking ass in films but not enough to warrant an entire blog dedicated to them. Its all about consistency. This weeks BMJ has been making pants tight and wet from fear for damn near forty years. I present to you the beautiful and talented (inside joke) Pam Grier!

Yes, please!

Born in Winston-Salem, North Carolina, Grier moved to Los Angeles where she worked as a receptionist. Jesus, can you imagine seeing a receptionist that looked like her? She was discovered by a director and starred in her first film, The Big Doll House. If you have not seen that film…wow. There is so much badness it turns around and becomes amazing. And she is not afraid to show her goods. I had to try to not find pictures of her boobs. Eventually she gained fame in starring roles in Coffy and Foxy Brown. These films made every Black person think they could do karate with hilarious results.