DVDiculous: Get The Gringo

I know how we all…well, most of us, feel about Mel Gibson. If he met me he’d probably smile but on the inside hope that me and a bunch of guys that looked like me would rape his baby mama to teach her a lesson for wearing tight pants. Or he would call me sugar tits. Either way his reputation has been rather fucked for quite some time. There are certain actors where their outside life will effect the way I enjoy a film with them. Like from now on if I see Michael Fassbender in a movie all I’m thinking is “Magneto has a giant penis. And that’s not fair.”  

Get The Gringo also known as How I Spent My Summer Vacation starts off with a crazy ass car chase with two guys running from cops and border patrol. They are dressed as clowns and one of them has been shot. Gibson known throughout the film as Driver is pissed that the guy in back is bleeding all over the money. He ends up crashing through the Mexican border.

"Ooh, money!"

The US cops and the Mexican cops decide to avoid all the paperwork involved in an arrest and hand Driver and his partner back to the US until one of them notice all the money in duffel bags. The US cops get pissed and leave. The police toss Driver in a prison holding cell that looks like the waiting room for a Spanish only corner of hell.

Its like that scene in Training Day...times thirty.

Driver gets his ass kicked a few times the first night there but knows to be patient and learn the rules. He also gets tackled and his blood taken. The next day he meets up with this kid who keeps asking him for cigarettes. The kid tells him how the prison runs and who is in charge. This guy named Javi is a total dick and killed the kid’s father. His mom also works for Javi at a brothel…in the prison. Yeah. He’s got it like that.

He doesn't drink beer often. But when he does...its made in prison.

The kids father had his kidney removed by Javi and it needs to be replaced so the kid is under protection. Driver meets the kids mom and they end up getting along after she slugs him while he is just standing there. A guy comes to the prison who knows that there is more to Driver’s story than he is telling and finds out that the money, two million dollars, and wants a cut.

The Mexican cops that took the money have been spending it and having a good time when they find out who the money belongs to. A guy named Frank played by Peter Stormare was robbed and he wants his money back. He has his men torture the cops before shooting them. Then Javi’s men show up and kill them. It’s a mess.

Whenever he's in a film people get hurt.

Javi finds out that the prison is going to be shut down and raided so orders his operation to happen sooner than later. Driver saves Javi by protecting the kid so Driver says that he can help out and gets out of prison to go kill Frank. He blows his ass up with a grenade by lobbing a grenade at him in an office building and sniping two guys following him. Oh, he used to be a sniper.

The kid is hidden by his mom when she spots the doctor arrive at the prison and Driver races back when he finds the asshole that was trying to blackmail him. Dude was in the middle of some strange sex involving getting waxed and having a hooker eat jalapeños. He gets back to the prison and all hell breaks loose.

This was a really cool movie. Forgetting the fact that Gibson is a nutbag he is still a really good actor. He wrote this movie and it has the same feel and tone of a movie like Payback also starring Gibson or Collateral. This isn’t one of those White man shows up and saves the day kind of films. Gibson is a total dick in this movie and anything he does that helps is by accident. Check it out if you can.