Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Fap Of The Year 2012: Sofia Vergara

2012 will go down as the year that the Fap Files took a dramatic hit. Hell, the Spank Bank was damn near depleted this year. So many women either messed with their faces, got pregnant, and forcibly removed themselves from the list by getting married. But one woman stayed fapable despite having a 20 year old son, being 40, being engaged, and hard to understand unless I pay attention. Sofia Vergara is the Fap Of The Year!

Last years winner Rosario Dawson disappeared from the public after winning the award and I searched high and low for this one. Looking at the files I compiled this year, only four, makes me and my junk sad. Vergara’s been busy with a hit series, being on her son’s reality show, being the face of Covergirl, starring in Pepsi commercials, and starting a clothing line for soccer mom’s for K-Mart that makes soccer mom’s wish they looked like her.

Click to enlarge...your pants.

In 2013 you ladies need to pick it up. I should be posting these things every other day I’m bombarded with so much lady parts. And if you’re under 26 don’t even bother applying. I’m looking for women 26 and up. Hell, you saw my last Fap Files. Even the elderly aren’t safe!

Behold! Two things greater than yourself!

Click here for previous Fap Files.

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