The Review: The Gray Man

The Gray Man 7/10

This was a cool movie but I'm not gonna be too descriptive because really there is no need. This dude is locked up in jail in the early 2000's for killing his father because his father was a monster and attacking him and his brother all the time. This CIA dude shows up like “Hey. You did the right thing. Join me. Kill bad people.” Dude, is like, “bet”, and he now works as a killer named Sierra Six. One mission in Bankgkok he is supposed to take this dude out but won't because a kid is close by and something seems off. Also his new boss Carmichael is a total dick. He chases the dude down and its another Sierra team member who knows there is some dirty nonsense going on. He dies and leaves Six with information to bring Carmichael down. Now Six is a target and Carmichael is doing everything to stop him. He hires this lunatic named Lloyd to kill him, has the former boss' granddaughter held hostage, brings in multiple teams of killers, and has a woman blow herself up to stop the bad guys. Its a lot of action and though the movie is long as hell it manages to fly by fairly quickly. It reminded me of a late 80's or early 90's action film but with a bigger budget. I liked the camera work (people are complaining about all the drone shots) and the music. Good casting as well. I liked who I was supposed to like and hated who I hated. What made me give this a lower score was the length and the final battle at the end. It was like running a marathon and someone handing you a bowl of oatmeal instead of water at the finish line. Its on Netflix so y'all can check it out.

Ryan Gosling as "Sierra Six"

Chris Evans as Lloyd Hansen

Ana de Armas as Dani Miranda

Jessica Henwick as Suzanne Brewer

Regé-Jean Page as Denny Carmichael

Julia Butters as Claire Fitzroy

Alfre Woodard as Margaret Cahill

Billy Bob Thornton as Donald Fitzroy

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Sitting In The Aisle: Nope

Nope 9/10

Spoilers! I was finally able to go see a brand new movie in a theater!!! Took three years but it happened. L. and I went to see Nope at the AMC on Sunset and since it is one of my two favorite theaters I was very happy. So with a belly full of Pinche's Tacos we went to see the movie...after half an hour of trailers. AMC needs to chill on that. So this movie starts on a old TV show set with a chimp straight up murdering people while someone watches from under a table. A balloon popping set it off and it went bananas. Ha. The monkey, Gordy, goes for a fist bump from the young boy, Jupe, that is watching and then gets its head blown off. They show that later on though.

The Review: Choose Or Die

Choose Or Die 2/10

This was a movie that could have been good but somehow lost its way. It reminded me of those shows I wont even begin to watch because based on the premise I know its gonna have a not-ending. L. was watching this and I missed the first scene but she told me what happened and I got the gist of it. Video game collector finds this old game called CURS>R and it starts interacting with his real life in dangerous ass ways. Months later this girl named Kayla who is friends with this guy named Isaac gets the game from him. She heads home and her mother is on drugs after Kayla accidentally let her younger brother drown. She works nights and her life seems like ass. Oh, and a guy in the building wants to sleep with her, her mom, and gives mom drugs so that's cool.

The Review: The Inkwell

The Inkwell 4/10

Okay. So I had never seen The Inkwell. I had heard of it and thought it was one of those classic Black movies that I managed to go decades without seeing. Well...this movie was ass and weird. It is about this 16 year old boy named Drew with the worlds thickest, driest afro who is a weirdo from New York in 1976. His family plans on going to see his aunt and her family in Martha's Vineyard. He talks to himself saying just random shit and has a doll that he talks to and speaks to him...in his mind. So they head out to this place and everyone seems to hate each other. Drew's grandmother seems to hate his mom. His aunt's husband seems to hate Drew's father. Drew's father hates all of them. He is a former Black Panther. He thinks the family is very uppity. I don't think so. I think they are just weirdos just like everyone else in the film.

Drew hangs with his cousin Junior who is a ladies man I guess. His room is filthy and he has two friends who are goofballs. As L. pointed out at least these guys aren't mean to Drew. They take him to the beach and Drew spots this girl named Lauren who has a perpetually shitty look on her face. At home it is never made clear why Drew's grandmother doesn't like her daughter. The fathers keep getting into it and they end up fighting on a tennis court at one point. Drew's parents are on the verge of divorce. Turns out that Drew set the house on fire and people are worried that he's nuts. I would say so. Drew gets set up with a therapist and she sees him talking to the doll in his bag. Drew meets this older lady named Heather whose husband Harold cheats on her at least three times in this movie.

Curtain Call: Kinky Boots

Kinky Boots 9/10

I finally got to see Kinky Boots again! This is my fourth time seeing the show and every time I have its always different people playing the parts. One guy will better a better Lola. Another a better Charlie. This time everyone was the best version of these characters. If you are wondering why I didn't give this a 10/10 it is because the sound issues at The Hollywood Bowl. Like...its the fucking Hollywood Bowl. Why are they having sound issues? Regardless, it was much better than the sound at Pantages where I've seen this three previous times and adapted to the bad sound system. Also they had kids perform again. Its only happened the first time I'd seen the play. Since 2020 I have missed being able to go see this show because it has become a tradition.

The Review: The Boys Season 3

The Boys Season 3 (10/10)

Holy shit this show is good! This gonna be full of spoilers. I need to figure out how the hell I am even gonna write about this because there are a lot of people and a lot of things happening. Maybe I will just go character by character and try to tie all of their stories together and see how it goes. This is gonna be a mess. This season was the most violent, funniest, most somehow emotional, and best acted season so far. First season was good. Second was great. This was incredible!

The Review: The Great Gatsby

The Great Gatsby 8/10

Weeks ago I finally watched The Great Gatsby. I had never read the book or seen any other versions of this but I do remember seeing the meme from this. I thought this was a movie about a dude that loved to party all the time. I was very wrong. This is told through the eyes of a guy that lived next door to Gatsby. His name is Nick and he is getting treatment at a hospital and is told to just write about Gatsby. In 1922 he moves to his new place and there is this dude that throws these crazy ass parties. His cousin Daisy is married to an asshat named Tom. He is loaded. Nick gets invited to Gatsby's party which a mutual friend of Daisy named Jordan is surprised because no one gets invited. Daisy's husband brings Nick to a town called Valley of Ashes where he messes around with a woman who is very much not his wife.

The Review: The Umbrella Academy Season 3

Umbrella Academy Season 3 (6/10)

This wont be long. I know that I said I was not gonna watch this show if they made it but I did. I ended up ironing and plowing through the third season. This was definitely better than the second one even though there were way more people. Just like previous seasons it picks up right where the last one left off. The team is stuck in an alternate reality where their goofy asses were never created. Instead their adoptive father created the Sparrow Academy because when he met them in the 60's he realized that they were fuck ups and wanted to fix that. Just like before the world is going to end because of things they have done and mistakes that were made and they need to stop it and they do but not without a bunch of confusion in between. The new team seems to have a more famous lifestyle than the Umbrella Academy did but seem like jerks still. None are really likable. Again for the third time in a row Klaus and Five are the most interesting parts of the series. Vanya/Viktor remains uninteresting. Diego is a shit fighter. Luther's a jackass. And Allison is a monster.

The Review: A Thin Line Between Love And Hate

 

A Thin Line Between Love And Hate 7/10

This movie was crazy as hell. L. picked this one out for me to watch for the first time. This is about this dude named Darnell that is a nightclub manager that gives out VIP cards like free candy to women he wants to have sex with. Like, he got mothers, laundry workers, whoever. Even though he sleeping with all these women he still has a thing for a woman he knew when he was little. I think most guys do by the way. Her name is Mia and she is in the Air Force and home to visit. One day outside the club he spots lady who refuses to deal with him and his friend Tee's advances. He slips his card into her limo as she drives away.