Child Protective Services went to Octomom’s house after finding out that the place was a shithole. But they still said she’s doing a good job…for an unfit parent I assume they mean. Remember how she is getting $2,000 a month in welfare? She just got her hair done for $520.
Fuck this woman. No, don’t! I was speaking metaphorically. Damn pervert. Oh, and the company that did her hair, Brazilian Blowout, decided to offer her free hair care. Kids, stop trying. Just fuck up and let the world take care of you.
Michael Jackson’s black surgical mask is being auctioned for $20,000. This planet is so strange to me. I’m going back to Mars. Oh, man, look at those cavemen go!
Lindsay Lohan was three hours late on the set of Glee because fuck work.
Sofia Vergara was carded at a bar and was not allowed in because she didn't have it. She is 39 and looks like this.
 |
| Say something, haters. |
Deion Sander’s future ex wife Pilar was arrested for jumping his ass with her friend. Stay classy, ma’am.
The Kardashian’s have been given $40,000,000 for the next three years of their show which will now be an hour long each episode. Heaven help us…
Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher are dating…I think. Fuck, I hope not. My Spank Bank can only take so many losses.
Jennifer Aniston may be getting married to her boyfriend Justin Theroux. This is like the fifth time she’s been rumored to marry someone. How can you top Brad Pitt? I guess if she married Ryan Gosling. That fucking guy is dreamy.
Former rapper and current preacher Ma$e owes the tax man. Trust me, I know how that feels. At least Jesus has his back. “Er, uh…” Jesus said while backing out of the room.
Chris Brown is now breeding pitbulls. Hey, he cant be a threat to humans all on his own.
Jennifer Hudson left the courtroom while images of her murdered family were shown. That makes sense. Hope they fry the fucker that killed her sister, mom, and nephew.
Bobby Brown has pleaded no contest in his DUI arrest. He’ll get 36 months probation and 90 days in an alcohol program. Dumbass.
The singing group TLC will be having a reunion tour…even though Lisa Left Eye Lopez is dead. They are gonna use that Tupac hologram shit to bring her back. Leave her out of this. She was my favorite. And T-Boz is chubby now and Chili makes me sad.
The Pregnant Man says his estranged wife attacked him and punched him in the crotch. That’s so not cool. Women, I know that in self defense classes they teach that shit, but its not good to do. I’ve been hit in the crotch and all it did was enrage me. You only drop to the ground when you want someone else in trouble.
Jessica Simpson is still pregnant.
No comments:
Post a Comment