Today is the day! After months of watching movies and dedicating hours of time, money, and conversation to this the Academy Awards come on and I haven’t been this excited about them since 2011. There were a lot of good films last year which surprised me since when the year had started I was looking forward to just two of them. This is just a summary of the films nominated for Best Picture. Click on the link in the title of each film to read my original reviews of each.
Amour
An elderly couple struggles with a wife’s failing health and annoying daughter. Was this a good movie? Yes. The acting was incredible. Was it one of the best movies I saw last year? Uh…yes? This is two and a half hours of watching an old lady die. If you wanna see that go to an old folks home and hang out for a while. I have said that you can wait to see this movie at home. I loved watching the uncomfortable shuffling in seats of couples in the theater. It makes you wonder what you’d do if a spouse was rotting away. Would you stay, go, or slap her once in a while? I think this is nominated because the actress is knocking on heavens door or because people like watching an old man try to catch a pigeon for five minutes. Best Foreign Film maybe but not Best Picture.
Argo
I didn’t know anything about this going in. This movie had me gasping, laughing, and cheering. I seriously loved this movie. Ben Affleck was like “Oh, you all wanna talk shit because I did Gigli, Jersey Girl, and Daredevil? Check this out. Yeah. How you like dem apples?!” Everyone in this put in work to make this one of the best films I’ve seen period. Saw it twice and had the same reactions each time. People complained that Affleck wasn’t Latino like the actual guy the story was based off of to which I say “Shut up and watch this and tell me it matters at the end of the movie!” This should win Best Picture.
Beasts Of The Southern Wild
Not only was this one of the biggest surprises of the year, it was one of the best films I’ve seen and instantly made my list of favorite films ever. It was one of those movies that reminds you why you enjoy the fact that we live in a reality where movies exist. This should’ve gotten a wider release but thankfully my nagging got more people to give this a try. There are gonna be a lot of pissed off folks watching this on DVD wondering why they didn’t see it in theaters. This should also win Best Picture.
Zero Dark Thirty
Meh. I was not blown away by this movie. I liked the way it looked but there wasn’t a single performance that made me nod and go “Wow, so and so really knocked it out the park.” Lots of people are praising Jessica Chastain for her role but if you sit and think about it almost any actress could’ve done what she did which was sit and look sad, worried, or upset. Despite all the time she spent overseas she managed to not age a day or looked sunburned. Yes, I am nitpicking. This movie wasn’t terrible but I’ll never watch it again.
Lincoln
Daniel Day-Lewis popped up out of nowhere and said “You remember that thing called ‘acting’?” and decided to kick everyone’s ass on screen. From the direction, music, scenery, to acting this movie covered every single base. Every time Lincoln spoke I stopped eating my popcorn so I could listen to him. Every other actor in this was amazing as well with Tommy Lee Jones stealing the show…almost. Please. You think Daniel Day-Lewis could have his show stolen?! Best Picture? Yeah. But I still want Beasts and Argo to win.
Django Unchained
For some reason the worst film Quentin Tarantino ever made is being nominated for Best Picture. Now, for everyone saying “Samuel L. Jackson was amazing!”, “Leonardo DiCaprio was amazing!”, and “Christophe Waltz was amazing!” I ask you “How about the star of the movie, Jamie Foxx?” I haven’t heard one person I know that has seen this mention him. QT’s use of every form of music in his soundtracks bit him in the ass this time since he had to recycle songs he has used before. The story was lazy. There was no editing to speak of. And the ending, both of them, pissed me right the fuck off. The only thing I liked about this movie was it gave me an excuse to say mandingo fighting. This is only Best Picture if no other pictures were made.
Silver Linings Playbook
This should’ve been called “Hugs Not Drugs.” Let’s set up the guy that almost beat a man to death and ended up in a institute with a restraining order from his wife because she slept with someone with the girl whose husband was killed so she decided to fuck everything that breathes. This movie treats mental disorders like a bad day. Surrounded by enablers, Bradley Cooper smirks his way through this movie with bursts of almost acting. Jennifer Lawrence is not a great actress. I don’t know what everyone is smoking thinking she is. I would’ve preferred an adult woman in the role since she made everyone else look older by being there. She needs to stick to films based in the Ozarks where her miserable expression fits. Not even close to Best Picture. I wouldn’t even rent this.
Life Of Pi
If there’s one thing I learned from this movie its that if you believe in God he will do everything in his power to fuck with you. “Your family died on a boat? Okay. Here’s a lifeboat. You looked bored. Let me toss a hyena, zebra, orangutan, and tiger in there with you! Put those crackers down, you don’t need to eat! Here’s a whale to spice things up!” This movie was the definition of a pretty plate with nothing on it. 3D for no reason and an ending that dragged on for way too long. Thank god for the tiger in the boat. He deserves Best Supporting Actor.
Les Misérables
I failed and didn’t see this. I’ll get around to it eventually but the plan was to see it before tonight. Boo this man! Boo!!!
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