Tuesday, April 23, 2013

The Classics Part 8

I was recently thinking about one of the best Royal Rumble's that ever happened. There have been a ton of memorable moments and stories that have led to good Wrestlemania moments. The best Rumble for me has got to be 1993's Royal Rumble. This Rumble had not only the largest amount of superstars but some really good feuds were coming to a head.

This Rumble started with that Steiner Brothers vs. Beverly Brothers match I covered before in the very first The Classics I posted. This match is what I say is the best tag team wrestling match I have ever seen. If someone asked me “What is tag team wrestling?” I would play that match for them. Even though the commentary didn't work for whatever reason with Gorilla Monsoon and Bobby Heenan it didn't take away how good it was. This is the match with the best Frankensteiner ever executed.

The next match was Shawn Michaels versus Marty Jannetty. This match was the culmination of the “Barbershop Window Incident.” Mind you, this was pre-internet. As far as I knew at the time dirt sheets were what my cousin made when he pissed the bed. I had no idea that HBK was gonna kick his partner in the damned face and toss him through a window. He literally kicked the popularity out of Jannetty! Besides being a great way to keep this feud going this match makes you miss Sensational Sherri and the role female managers played when they were on their A game. I had no idea which way Sherri was gonna turn during this match.

The next match was Bam Bam Bigelow versus Big Boss Man. Uh...that happened. I seriously cant even remember this taking place.

Next up was for the WWF Championship with Bret Hart defending against Razor Ramon. Damn, Razor was a dick during this time period! He was fucking around attacking Owen (this was when getting hit with a trashcan ended with stretchers arriving on scene), trash talking Bret during matches and interviews. This match was just about as good as their match at the first King Of The Ring. Second Sharpshooter attempt. Pah! Ya done, son! Bret retains and I cheered like a little girl because he was Bret was my hero at this time.

Next Bobby Heenan brought out his latest wrestler, “The Narcissist” Lex Luger! I was like“That's...just Luger.” I was never a huge fan of his particularly since my brother could easily apply the damned Torture Rack to me whenever he pleased. Sitting eating cereal? Torture Rack. Going to take a leak? Torture Rack. Crying because I was put in the Torture Rack? Torture Rack. The shit was endless. So, yeah. The best part about this is looking at what was defined as hot in the 90's when they zoom in on chicks in the audience and Heenan's damn near fainting as he begs Luger to disrobe. Remember Chris Master's long ass entrance? Okay. No imagine it times twenty. I guess it worked though. 20 years later and I recall it better than Bam Bam and Boss Man's match.

Now it is time for the Royal Rumble! Apparently this was the first time where winning equaled a shot at the belt. I had cleaned the entire damned house for this moment. The match starts off with Bob Backlund and Ric Flair in the ring. Yeah. That is how this damned thing starts! How can I even make a comparison for younger readers? That would be like Undertaker and The Rock starting the Rumble in 2014. I guess. I don't know who you kids like nowadays. Heath Slater? Fandango? But seriously, I like Fandango. Not as a wrestler since a diving legdrop is ass. But the whole dancing shit makes me laugh. Back to the match!

This match had Virgil getting his revenge on against Ted DiBiase. The Natural Disasters (Earthquake and Typhoon) beginning to break up. Giant Gonzalez showed up and tossed Taker around like a ragdoll. Even as a child I thought his outfit was ridiculous. So no Taker for the Rumble. Now anything could happen. Hell, Fatu could be fighting for the belt!

Here are some of the names that were involved. Papa ShangoRick MartelTito SantanaCarlito's dad Carlos Colon (when he came to the ring I was like “The hell is this guy?!”), Owen Hart, IRSJerry LawlerKoko B. Ware, and Mr. Perfect. And of course Macho Man Randy Savage!

He and Yokozuna were the last two men in the ring and from what I remember Macho was the first person to ever take Yokozuna off his feet. He headed up to the top rope, delivered the elbow drop, and...went for the pin? What?! Yoko benchpressed him off his chest and over the top rope! I was furious! I seriously thought that he was gonna find some way to get Yoko over the top rope and win it.

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