Nothing But Gossip January 23rd 2014

Tori Spelling's husband Dean McDermott has kinda admitted to cheating on her and has checked himself into rehab. He stated “I take full responsibility for my actions and have voluntarily checked myself into a treatment center to address some health and personal issues. I am grateful to be getting the help I need so I can become the husband and father my family deserves.” I smell a new reality show! He is also being accused of not paying the people who made his cookbook.

Dumbass Justin Bieber was arrested for DUI, speeding (doing 60mph in a 30mph area), resisting arrest, driving with a expired license, and drag racing. When arrested he blew a .04 which is half the limit it takes to be arrested. Not bad. Except for the fact that he isn't old enough to drink here. He was also high on weed and codeine. He reportedly said “Why the fuck are you doing this? What the fuck did I do? Why did you stop me?” And then when a cop tried to search him he shouted “I ain't got no fucking weapons, why do you have to search me? What the fuck is this about?” Welcome to America, bitch. This asshole's bail ($2,500) was set at far less than he just spent at a strip club ($75,000) a few days ago.

Also being reported, his crew blocked traffic so that he could street race. A part of this crew apparently is his father, Jeremy Bieber who is 38. Rapper Khalil was also arrested since he was the one racing Bieber.

While we are talking about his family who do not get much press, when arrested and asked where he got the prescription drugs from he said he took whatever his mother gave him for anti-anxiety. Thanks, mom!

Johnny Depp is supposedly engaged to actress Amber Heard who met one another on the set of The Rum Diaries. He is 50. She is 27. They hooked up reportedly right after he split with the mother of his two kids. So if I do the Hollywood math they should split up before the end of the year.

Some weirdo calling himself Brando Murphy is telling the world that he is Eddie Murphy's son. Eddie will admit to doing a lot of crazy shit, but claiming this freak isn't one of them. He does claim that hot ass daughter though.

Damn. Damn. Daaaaaaaamn!

Macaulay Culkin's dad had a huge stroke and it is being said that he wanted to make peace with his son before it happened. They have not spoken in years. Sucks to be you, dad. Sometimes some shit don't wash.

Rapper Young Jeezy was arrested again for resisting arrest. He is in trouble for beating the fuck out of his 16 year old son (allegedly) a few weeks ago. This time it's because a panic alarm went off in his home and cops responded. He lost his cool and ended up in jail. Keep calm and shut the fuck up when the cops arrive.

Also, rapper Soulja Boy was arrested for carrying a loaded handgun in the San Fernando Valley after he ran a stop sign early in the morning. I swear...

Tired of getting no attention since her sister Kim is constant drama and her now 18 year old sister Kendall is being offered porn work Kylie Jenner got a fake tattoo and posted it online.

Lookatmelookatmelookatmelookatme!

That loony ass kid that screamed at Kim Kardashian and ended up being beat up by Kanye West wants a lot of cash from the incident. He doesn't have any injuries but if Kanye doesn't want this added to his list of assaults in his upcoming trial, he'd better pony up. You ever notice that all the people Kanye beats up don't get hurt? I think his hands must be made of pillows.

The Bachelor star Juan Pablo Galavis (don't worry I don't know who he is either really) said that gay people are more “pervert” than other people when asked if there could be a gay Bachelor show and that it would be a bad influence on kids. Then he said he didn't mean it that way and it got mixed up because of his accent. I love that a single father can go on a TV show that is about a bunch of random ass women that are competing to be his wife and gropes and kisses almost all of them can say that gay people could be a bad influence on anyone. What a fucking creep.

Russell Simmons and Shannon Elizabeth may or may not be dating. I also may or may not be jealous. Whatevs. His ex wife Kimora Lee still has one of the hottest mugshots ever.

It's that inch of stomach that gets me.

Consistent asshole Shia LeBeouf says that all of his stupid ass behavior is performance art. I need to remember to use that as an excuse.

Singer Mary J. Blige's 63 year old father, Thomas Blige, is in critical condition after being stabbed by his ex girlfriend.

Sean Penn and Charlize Theron are fucking. No! No! No! No! No!

The Spank Bank is at an all time low!