Theater Whore: Foxcatcher

Foxcatcher 8/10

Wow. Foxcatcher was a really good film. Notice how I said film and not movie. That means its classy. I had heard how good this was and just never got around to seeing it a while back because there have been so many movies out. This is based off of a true story and one of those type of films that come out every few years. No explosions or anything, just really good acting by people you wouldn't expect this level of acting from.

Steve Carell plays John du Pont. He is a weird ass rich man from the du Pont family. He enjoys sports and since he can't play them and wasn't allowed to growing up he sponsors athletes. He calls on and brings in Mark Schultz played by Channing Tatum. He is an Olympic gold medalist with his brother Dave Schultz played by Mark Ruffalo. John brings in the younger Mark to help train a team for wrestling, Team Foxcatcher. Things quickly get very weird.

In Defense Of Channing Tatum As Gambit

Stop the presses! Channing Tatum has been announced as playing Gambit in a standalone film as well as the new X-Men movie! Now, a lot of people are upset about this. Why? Because they are haters and have not accepted the fact that this guy that your woman wants to bang would actually be able to pull this off.

I know how it feels. I used to hate this guy. I only knew him as the hot guy in films I would only watch to get laid by a girl that had a moment of weakness and I was the closest available man or the dude from those terrible looking Step Up movies. I borderline hated this guy. But then I saw 21 Jump Street and Magic Mike and all of a sudden he was likable.

Theater Whore: 22 Jump Street

22 Jump Street 6/10

Since I liked 21 Jump Street so much that I had to watch this sequel 22 Jump Street. It has the same stars, Channing Tatum, Jonah Hill, Nick Offerman, and Ice Cube. But they added a few more to the cast and one that was especially awesome and deserved way more screen time was Jillian Bell. That girl was funny as hell and I'd never seen her in anything before. The movie starts with a guy named Ghost played by Peter Stormare who is the bad guy, of course. Schmidt (Hill) and Jenko (Tatum) go undercover as cholos to try and bust them. It all goes to shit when an octopus jumps Schmidt and the bad guys get away.

Deputy Chief Hardy (Offerman) sends Schmidt and Jenko on another undercover case. He tells them to do exactly what they did the last time. He then goes on to explain what is going to happen in the movie including all the problems they will have and how they will overcome them. They need to find out why a girl was killed that involves a drug called WHYPHY (Word hard, yes. Play harder yes.) and are roomed together. Immediately Jenko makes friends with the jocks while Schmidt struggles as usual to talk to people. Schmidt ends up meeting and hooking up with a girl named Maya played by Amber Stevens who has the roommate from hell.

DVDiculous: GI Joe Retaliation

I decided to watch GI Joe: Retaliation because I don't even know. I have no real explanation as to why I decided to watch this. I saw the first one and it was quite terrible but I hoped that with Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson and Channing Tatum who I now like in films (sometimes) this would be better. It wasn't. Its funny because I tend to like films where things explode but I tend to get upset when they try and have a plot that's complicated when it doesn't need to be.

On one side you have Roadblock and Duke, Johnson and Tatum, who are making explosions, running from explosions, and playing video games with explosions. Shit you not, they show them sitting at home paying videos games. Because I don't know about the rest of you, but when I think of a blockbuster film with action, I think of watching them play video games. Duke ends up getting killed in an explosion and I didn't care. Roadblock gets all revenge mode meaning doing shit that goes against everything he tells others.

Theater Whore: Magic Mike

I celebrated the 4th of July by watching a bunch of half naked and in some cases completely naked men dancing on stage. This isn't something I did in real life. I watched the movie with Cam at the Arclight over in Hollywood. I wasn't dying to see this but heard from some reviews that it wasn't what I was imagining when I pictured what the movie was. That's half a lie because I saw more man than I could've begun to imagine!

That's a lot of man!

In the theater were a few gay male couples and one poor woman who couldn't find a friend who left halfway through the movie. Magic Mike is the story of Mike who is a male dancer by night and a bunch of other things by day. Mike wakes up in bed with two women and is embarrassed when he and one of the women he is sleeping with cant remember the other girl’s name. While working construction he meets this kid named Adam who gets in trouble for stealing a soda from the site and whose car breaks down.

Theater Whore: 21 Jump Street

I so didn’t want to see 21 Jumpstreet. I’d seen the trailer and all the billboards posted all over the damned city and it just didn’t look good. But then I remembered how trailers have really fucked me over in the past few years and decided to give this a try. I’m glad I did because this turned out to be a very funny film. Why? Because they point out the obvious just when you’re thinking the same damned thing.