The Review: The Glass Castle

The Glass Castle 4/10

Years ago I read the book The Glass Castle and loved it. I remember seeing a trailer for this and got excited because the cast of Brie Larson and Woody Harrelson. It is on Amazon so I decided to check it out today and was super disappointed with it. I was not comparing it to the book since I can not recall the book completely, just a feeling of “Wow, this lady is way more forgiving of her parents than I would be.” This movie makes it seem even more so and by the end it felt like I was straight up watching a movie and could not even enjoy it anymore and the longer it went, it's over two hours, I was like You know what? I totally could not have seen this and been fine.”

Theater Whore: Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri 10/10

Tonight Cam and I headed to The Arclight to check out Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri. I'd wanted to see this earlier this year and found out it wasn't coming out till way later. If I had seen this sooner I would have easily added it to my Best Movie Of 2017 list. This is one of those movies that looks really dark but has some funny parts but turned out to be an actual dark comedy. It helps that there was an old lady in the theater meowing and making spooky sounds randomly. Sounds terrible but that shit was hilarious. Seriously. One of the best parts of going to movies is looking at other movie goers. The theater was pretty packed but we had some good seats because I am a professional seat picker.

The Review: A Prairie Home Companion

A Prairie Home Companion 8/10

I went to AFI Fest with Koko and this cutie the other day and got to see two movies. The first was A Prairie Home Companion directed by Robert Altman. I had zero idea what this movie was about though I had heard of it before. I thought maybe it was about a farm and dying horses or something. Seriously. I did not know when it was made or who was in it. I actually thought it was a much older film based on the title. I was wrong about a lot of this movie meaning everything.

The Review: Seven Psychopaths

This will have spoilers. Last night I watched the crazy ass movie Seven Psychopaths. Its hard to even explain what its about because while it is a good movie I was more interested in the movie within the movie. Colin Farrell is Marty Freeman who is struggling to finish a script called Seven Psychopaths. 

For some reason he can't think of any good ones to create. He also has a drinking problem. His friend is Billy Bickle played by Sam Rockwell. He and Hans played by Christopher Walken steal folks dogs and bring them back for a reward.

TV Slut: True Detective

What an amazing TV show! If you have heard people talking about True Detective and how great a show it is, they aren't lying to you. You can keep all your shows about zombies that have no real ending, drug dealers, and serial killer shows that don't know when to stop. I'll stick to the show about two detectives trying to solve a bunch of creepy and grizzly ass murders going on in Louisiana.

This stars Woody Harrelson as Martin “Marty” Hart and Matthew McConaughey as Rustin “Rust” Cohle. Everyone just calls them Rust and Marty.

The way the show is paced in great. It goes back and forth between a terrible murder from 1995 and an investigation in 2012. When Marty who has two daughters and is married first meets Rust things are off from the beginning. Rust is a strange man. He has his beliefs and they are strong and there's no way in hell to convince him otherwise. He rubs people the wrong way with his straightforward way of talking and handling things. Marty seems good at his job but of course as the series goes on you see more and more of what is wrong with this guy.

Theater Whore: Out Of The Furnace

This is gonna be a pretty fast review. The trailer for Out Of The Furnace made this look like a pretty great film. Hell, the cast alone made me wanna see this. Christian Bale, Casey Affleck, Forest Whitaker, Willem Dafoe, and Woody Harrelson? Come on! That is a lot of good in one place. So why didn't I enjoy a single moment of this movie? Mostly for the fact that it was about halfway through this two hour movie where what is shown immediately in the trailer occurs.

The story is something that could've been done on a half hour episode of some show. Brother comes back home from war a fuck up, the other brother is a drunk fuck up, his woman meets someone new, fuck up war brother gets killed because he is a fuck up, and evil guy ends up paying for a crime that is slightly more fucked up than the ones everyone else did.

This movie just happened. There's no need to tell any of you to ever see this. The accents that people have are bad. The acting is so wooden. It was like watching a bunch of people on screen who didn't quite want to be there. Its not even bad because its sad, because its not really sad. It made me feel no emotions other than the joy that comes with not living where they do.

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