Sunday, March 22, 2015

DVDiculous: Single Moms Club

Yesterday my cousin Mala brought me some dinner after I had a root canal because she is awesome. I was flipping through Amazon trying to find something to watch and we stumbled upon Tyler Perry's movie Single Mom's Club. Now...come on. I am not a fan of this guy and a lot of it is due to the fact that he has one note and every guy in his movies looks better than I ever will. Yeah. I'm not using a single image of any of them in this review. Deal with it. I'm also not saying the name of any of the actresses because in this movie they are types.

This is about five different mothers that are single dealing with their kids that all go to the same school. They were all busted smoking cigarettes and tagging on walls. The mothers are forced to work together to plan something for the school or have their kids booted. There is plain mother. Okay, fuck it. I gotta use their names. Nia Long plays Plain Mother. She is a writer because why not. Tyler Perry is trying to bang her in this with his creepy beard. Her son is an asshole that needed a good throat punch because he took every opportunity to point out that he was going to live with his dad. Little does he know his daddy is a crackhead now that would later jack his own son. Whah-whah...

Wendi McLendon-Covey is in this and way thinner than I have ever seen her. She is Business Mom. She is more concerned with success and making her daughter like her than caring about having a kid. She got her daughter from a sperm donor. Her daughter hates her. Business Mom is as close to racist as you can come and never got punched for the shit she said. No one is after her sexually. Amy Smart plays herself as Overwhelmed Mom. She has three kids and since her maid handled everything she has no relationship with her daughter. The maid even helped her use a tampon. A tampon!!! She is wanted by Creative Guy.

There is Latina Mother as well played by Zunay Henao. She did not belong her. Her problem was that her ex husband paid for all her shit and told her that if she ever dated again he'd stop paying for her life. Her new man hates that he has to hide and keep their relationship secret. She is the only one getting laid in this and is struggling in no way. Sexy Giant Cuban Man has her. Last is Black Mama played by Cocoa Brown. She has two sons in jail, two daughters, and a smart son that she doesn't want to end up like his brothers. Black Mama uses slang I have not heard since 1989. She is being pursued by Terry Crews.

This movie was pretty bad an predictable but funny if you enjoy talking during a movie. And it is almost two hours long which is ridiculous. The only drama is when Plain Mother's son leaves during a sleepover and they can't find him because he was busy being jacked by his dad. I won't tell you to see this, but I also won't won't tell you not to.

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