The Review: Okja

Okja 10/10

There will be a lot of spoilers in this. I need to stop saying that and just say don't read movies reviews until after you've watched shit if you are worried about it being ruined. I gave it a 10/10. Watch it. I loved this fucking movie! Okay, I had no idea what this movie was about before I started watching it. Coworker said she could not watch it because of it making you not want to eat meat anymore to which I responded watching Super Size Me and wanting McDonald's and eating a burger while watching Food Inc. You can't stop me from eating meat. I saw a big pig with a city on its back with a little girl and the title Okja. That was the extent of my knowledge of this movie. I was excited to watch it and not even sure why but I am so glad that I did.

The Review: Swiss Army Man

Swiss Army Man 8/10

Someone at work showed me the trailer for Swiss Army Man and the next day my cousin Jasmine mentioned it because she had seen it. We decided to check it out and I am so glad we did. This is one of those movies where if the trailer doesn't get you interested you should skip it. I saw it and was all in. This stars Paul Dano as this guy named Hank all alone on an island that wants to just die. He is just about to hang himself when he notices a man wash ashore. He slips and for real begins to hang before falling down and pulling the body ashore.

Theater Whore: 12 Years A Slave

I have heard some people say that 12 Years A Slave either made them mad or was super violent. It is very violent as any film that takes place during slavery will be, but it didn't make me mad. I cant be mad about slavery anymore. Disappointed that it happened, yes. But to see a movie like this and leave ready to go bonkers on White people is just silly. You and I were never slaves. Enough of my small rant. My film would have been called 12 Minutes A Slave: The Tale Of A Man Being Shot Immediately. 

This movie does quite a bit of jumping back and forth at first between showing Solomon Northup (who was a real dude) played by Chiwetel Ejifor as a free man living up North and his time on a plantation in New Orleans (Michael K. Williams makes too far a short appearance as well). He is shown being beaten and trying to explain who he is and everyone is kinda like “No, you are Platt! Now go pick cotton!” Which he does. He was drugged and sold into slavery so its like Taken for Black people.

Happy Black people in 1800's means something bad's about to happen!

I know this sounds ridiculous for someone who is laying on a comfy ass bed and writing a movie review, but I've always said that I would rather just die. I honestly would. Life is awesome...in 2013. This is a guy that was actually free. As free as a Black man could be in 1841. After a few months (meaning days) of this bullshit I'd rather just not exist. Fuck being hit. Benedict Cumberbatch buys Solomon and Paul Dano is his “master” so the creepy factor has just doubled considerably.