The Review: The Iceman

The Iceman 5/10

I finally watched this movie The Iceman starring Michael Shannon as the real life serial killer Richard Kuklinski. I had meant to watch this for a while since I watched the documentary about the guy years ago on cable. This movie should have been way better than it was but it seemed like they were trying to make this lunatic somewhat a good guy and as if he were just doing bad things to get money to give his family a better life. They showed a few moments of him losing his shit at home but left out how he beat his wife played by Winona Ryder and would be evil as hell for long periods of time. In this it was more like he would lose his temper and some of the bad would get out for his family to see. This movie definitely had a Goodfellas vibe to it which wasn't helped by the fact that Ray Liotta was in it.

Theater Whore: Homefront

You should never poke a Jason Statham. A bunch of drug dealers, users, and bad guys learn this the hard way in Homefront. I wasn't dying to see this but movies that I want to see are few and far between this year so I gave this a chance. This is based off a book by Chuck Hogan but the screenplay was by Sylvester Stallone. Don't laugh. That man wrote Rocky. This movie starts off with Statham as Phil Broker who is an undercover DEA agent. The DEA raid this bar full of bikers and meth. Next thing you know Broker is chasing them on a motorcycle, using it as a weapon, and the lead biker's son is shot and killed. Drugs are bad, kids.

Now living in a small town in the South where nothing good ever happens. Seriously. You say the words “small town” and “in the South” I just sit back and wait for violence. His daughter who consistently made me yell at the screen punches and spin kicks a kid in the face. Now, this chubby bastard totally deserved it. He was a movie bully in every sense. He takes her hat and she whips him. She looked silly as hell in that hat and would never wear that for real's but its a plot device. Broker has to show up and try to smooth things over but the mother played by Kate Bosworth and her husband are having none of it.

DVDiculous: The Letter

East asked if I had seen a movie called The Letter that had come out last year starring James Franco and Winona Ryder. She didn't like it. I like the two of them just fine as actors so I gave it a try. Wow. What a boring ass movie. I'm not even mad. I'm confused. Even as I watched it I asked myself “Why was this made? Who is this for?”

Here is what the movie is described as on Wikipedia. I will not adjust any of the spelling errors. “A playwright, Martine (Ryder) suffers from paranoia and hallucations as she attempts to stage a new production. She is uncertain over whether she is deluded or if there is a plot against her. Tyrone (Franco) is an actor in Martine's new play.” Now, that sounds like it could be interesting, but its totally not. If I saw this in the theater I would be pissed not only for wasting money but because its so fucking quiet that I know my stomach would growl at all the wrong times. By the time it gets to the part where she totally loses her shit I'd already cashed out.