"Bad Ass Mofo": Jason Statham

“You ain't ever gonna get an Academy Award for doing Crank and you certainly won't for doing all the other movies I've done.” Jason Statham

For years Jason Statham has been the guy that every other guy wants to be. Not only is he in shape, know martial arts, used to be a model, dates a hot model, and been in cool action movies. The main reason men want to be him is because he has a great accent and we all know that no matter where you live on this planet that the guy with the accent wins automatically.

Too busy looking cool to look back.

I didn’t make the rules! I’m just here to enforce them and I brought this guy to enforce them with me. So get your shit together. This week’s Bad Ass Mofo will not only kick your ass in ways you didn’t imagine, but he’ll look good doing it.

This is all your date sees during his movies. 

Mind you, he got started after he was 30 years old. That means he had three decades to perfect the art of ass kicking and making your girlfriend regret dating you. It doesn’t hurt that his first two films Lock, Stock, & Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch were so good. But somewhere along the way he got lost…

And by "lost" I mean every film involved guns aimed at him.

I make fun of him for films like Crank in which he plays a guy that has to keep his adrenaline levels up of else he’ll die. So he has sex in public, injects himself with enough drugs to kill a Whitney Houston, and skydives. Oh, wait. That was him dying in the first and then living to make a sequel.

This. Was. Filmed.

In the three (yes, there were three) Transporter films he is kinda just a more quiet version of the previous character. But for some reason he makes it work! I don’t know how but, damn it, he’s that much of a BAM that he will take a bad script, add some bad acting, and make a watchable film. Its magical.

Jason Statham has gone from starring in films that everyone loved to films that you admit to watching.

“Have you seen Killer Elite?!”

“I don’t know! I don’t know!”

I totally did.