“The game opens as the fairy Navi awakens Link from a nightmare, in which Link witnesses a stormy night where a man in black armor on horseback chases after a girl on a white horse. Navi brings Link to the guardian of Link's village, the Great Deku Tree, who is cursed and near death. Link breaks the curse, but cannot stop the tree from withering. The Deku Tree tells Link a ‘wicked man of the desert’ has cursed him and seeks to conquer the land of Hyrule and that Link must stop him. Before dying, the Great Deku Tree gives Link the spiritual stone of the forest, the Kokiri's Emerald, and sends him to Hyrule Castle to speak with the ‘princess of destiny.’ As Link is leaving, his close friend Saria bids him good luck and gives him the Fairy Ocarina, a precursor to the Ocarina of Time.”
This was a very intense game. I sucked at it hard because it required too much thought and stuff. I’m not a thought kinda guy when it comes to games. So I had my ex say “
Do this, this, and then that” and I would and kick ass. You had to get this giant guide book and also purchase an extension pack to make the game run smoothly. I also had to buy a
Rumble Pack to feel the vibrations. Feel it, feel it! But sometimes I didn’t feel like saving everyone from the evil bastards around
Hyrule. Sometimes I just felt like spending hours fishing. And I did!
A cool thing about this was that you got a horse,
Epona! That horse could be your best friend or the most stubborn fucking beast to ever exist. You first had to break the damn thing. Then you had to learn the song to call it. Oh, and you had to feed the damn things carrots to make it run but time it so that it didn’t get pissed off and start bucking. But once you controlled this thing properly it was groovy. Until you came across a place that was too scary for Epona and it would just be like “
Fuck you, elfboy!” and starts screaming.
The villain once again is
Ganon or
Ganondorf or whatever the hell they call him this time. You had to use a badass grappling hook that when you pointed it you could
Batman your ass up things. This is on top of all the swords, shields, and cool shit you got. You had to run across this small ledge and dodge his energy blasts while shooting him with your light arrows. Once you did you had to jump across a space and hack the shit out of him! Then run and repeat. Then you think he’s dead but he uses his last (
?) breath to bring the castle down.
As you race from the castle fighting skeletons with
Princess Zelda in tow who helps open doors for you and then you make it out and that’s the end. Except that Ganon rises from the rubble, knocks your cool sword away. Then he surrounds you and him in flames and is a giant monster with two swords. You have to roll between his legs and chop the fuck out of his tail. This game kicks so much ass and after you beat it you can play again but with all the awesome weapons you won the first time. If you haven’t played this game you should. Its
still fun.
No comments:
Post a Comment