Justice
League 1/10
This
is not a fun movie. You'd think a movie with all of these characters
would at the very least be fun but it was very much not. It wasn't
even cool. With superhero or comic book based movies if you can't get
anything right the very least you can do is make characters look like
they are supposed to or cool. That does not happen with this. And for
anyone that says I am a Marvel whore and love all their movies (which
I don't) I have a goddamn Batman tattoo on my right arm and a Warner
Bros. based one on the left. So kiss my ass. I have no brand loyalty,
not even with the toothpaste or toilet paper I buy. I just wanna be
entertained...and have nice breath and a clean ass.
I
would like to point out the thing that this movie got right...but I
can't. I didn't like anything about this. The story is basic as shit.
Big, bad guy comes and wants to transform the planet. Batman gathers
Flash, Cyborg, Wonder Woman, and Aquaman to stop him. Along the way
they bring Superman from the dead who promptly whips their asses.
Together they battle the bad guy and a bunch of henchmen in clouds of
dust and murk. Jesus, this movie is murky as fuck with super shaky
effects. And some things do not need to be in slow motion. Fast movie shit looks cooler sometimes. I also kept thinking Superman looked weird and then remembered
that they had to digitally remove his mustache for this movie. He
just looks strange especially when he smiles.
There
are some small things that could have really helped this movie. Like
using Flash from the series. Toss in all the people from the DC
television shows! They are established and have been around for years
now. Nah. The Flash they chose for this is not as funny as people
have been saying. It's like the Wonder Woman effect. That movie was
not that good but compared to BvS and Man Of Steel it was a delight.
If I wanna save the world I am not gonna bring a kid that can't
fight, a robot man that gets new powers he can't control every time
he wakes up, a water dude that doesn't give a shit about the world, a
regretful Batman, an Amazonian that hasn't done fuck all on over
60 years, and an out of control alien that could destroy the world
that just came back from the dead. If you wanna see a good Justice
League movie check out Justice League War. DC makes way better
animated movies than live action ones. Thankfully this shit was
short.
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