The Review: Good Neighbours

Good Neighbours 5/10

This movie was weird as hell. Good Neighbours is about this strange ass cat loving woman named Louise living in Montreal at a diner. One of her coworkers gets raped and murdered as there is someone just running around comitting these crimes. A new guy moves in. He weird. Her neighbor is a dude in a wheelchair who lost the use of his legs after a car accident that also killed his wife. New neighbor likes her but wheelchair dude does too and I was like “Didn't your wife just die?” There is this other lady that lives in the building that is always yelling and hates the lady's cats so she poisons them. Louise decides to kill and rape the evil lady using the same manner which the real killer does as revenge using new neighbors sperm. She finds out that wheelchair dude can walk and is the real killer. They make plan to kill new neighbor because he knows too much. Cops get involved, killer goes after new neighbor, killer falls off balcony and dies, Louise gets to keep new cat from new neighbor. This movie was strange as fuck. I am pretty sure this was supposed to be a dark comedy but once she strangled that lady to death and stuck a dildo in her it lost all rights to be comedic.

Jay Baruchel as Victor

Scott Speedman as Spencer

Emily Hampshire as Louise

Anne-Marie Cadieux as Valérie

Diane D'Aquila as Miss Van Ilen

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The Review: Unstoppable

 

Unstoppable 8/10

This movie should not have been as good as it was. Very basic story of a runaway train and two men trying to stop it. Tony Scott directed it and that man had the ability to make brushing your teeth look action packed. An idiot accidentally sets a train loose on the world and it is full of chemicals that will just ruin a lot of lives and a dude about to retire soon and a new guy that seems over it on his first damn day. Of course later you find out more about each guy while on a collision course that becomes a train chase. This movie had the back of my knees sweating with tension.

The Review: Simple Simon

Simple Simon 7/10

I watched this movie called Simple Simon with B&H starring Bill Skarsgård is what I would call a cute movie. It is about a kid with Asperger Syndrome and how his behavior impacts those that are close to him or attempt to get close to him. The original title is Irymden Finns Inga Känslor which means In Space There are No Feelings. That title is long but closely relates to how when Simon starts to freak the fuck out he will hide in this capsule and pretend that he is in space. He will not respond to his mother and father but will talk to his brother who pretends he is at mission control and will talk to Simon in English. One day Simon ends up moving in with his brother and his girlfriend. Simon is like a controlled tornado. He has everything he does measured out by quantity and time. If you touch him he will attack you like a girl on the street found out. The time before she bumped into him and he slapped her was less than a second. Simon and his ways ends up being too much for his brothers girlfriend after Simon is just standing in the bedroom while they are boning down complaining about the toilet paper being all gone. She leaves and Simon decides he will use science to get his brother a new girlfriend.

The Review: Iron Man 2

Iron Man 2 (8/10)

Today I decided to break my own rule I just started by watching something I have seen before. I watched Iron Man 2 which I have not seen in years. Two years ago I re-watched Iron Man and it made me appreciate the amount of growth the character has had in all these years since it happened. I felt the same way watching this one. Iron Man 3 I don't wanna talk about. I forgot that the villain in this one, Whiplash played by Mickey Rourke, had a good reason to be upset and really got into Tony Stark's mind. Robert Downey Jr. was in the damned groove making this. I had forgotten how irresponsible Iron Man had become. This takes place months after the first film and Stark is getting drunk, having parties, and scaring the hell out of anyone associated with his company.

The Review: Despicable Me

I finally got around to watching the movie Despicable Me which came out almost five years ago. It stars Steve Carell as Gru who is a super villain that is being out-shined by a villain that has been taking monuments from around the world. He ends up adopting these three girls to get them into the home of a villain to steal his shrink ray and head to the moon. I didn't like this movie. I get why some people would because crazy things happen and the voices are strange but it wasn't enough to keep me interested. An animated film shouldn't feel long.

All I knew about it was that there were little yellow creatures that sound like Shakira and Carell did the voice of the bad guy. The voice was immediately distracting to me. If there was no strange accent it would've helped me like this a tiny bit more. 

It felt like that movie Megamind where it was as if I jumped into some story that was past halfway done and I was playing catch up. There are some animated movies that make me laugh my ass off like Penguins of Madagascar or are all around good like How To Train Your Dragon 2. I didn't laugh a single time while watching this. I don't get why people love this so much.

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DVDiculous: A Serbian Film

There are some films that fuck you up mentally. Like, after you watched them you cant stay warm, food doesn’t taste as good, and you have a hard time looking in the mirror. A Serbian Film is that kinda film. I was told that it was supposed to be extreme and hardcore to which I said “Ha! I am the definition of hardcore! Wanna see my comic book collection?!”

I was so wrong.