Theater Whore: Non-Stop

Non-Stop 5/10

That Liam Neeson, huh? For the past few years he has been cranking out crazy film after crazy film. Action films where no one believes he is who he says. Films where his daughter gets kidnapped and then the sequel where he and his wife have to be saved by the daughter. Battleship. How about the one where he fought wolves? Just nonsense. And I love it. I like that he is making films where he punches things until they stop moving.

In this movie Non-Stop Neeson plays a guy named Bill Marks who is a U.S federal air marshal. You can tell from the start that he has a drinking problem. As he gets to the plane he comes across various assholes who are also on the same flight. He gets on and meets this lady named Jen Summers played by Julianne Moore.

Neeson (I refuse to refer to him by any other name) starts getting text messages saying that people on the plane are gonna start being killed every twenty minutes until he has $150 million put into his account. Neeson finds the other air marshal and asks him about this and it turns out that this guy is smuggling a shit ton of cocaine. They get into a bathroom fight and Neeson kills him because that is one of his two settings.

The other is attracting hot dames.

Neeson is trying to keep all this stuff under wraps but then someone is dead, then the pilot dies. People are looking at the guy with the long beard because racism. They have some red herrings tossed in but they were so obvious that when it is revealed who the bad guy is its so damned obvious. At certain points I started to think that the person killing these people was a damned ghost. Some of the kills that happened were impossible to have been done by a normal human. I was waiting for Neeson to rips someone's mask off and reveal an old farmer getting revenge on the airlines.

This movie wasn't terrible or anything. It was just a crazy ass Neeson film. It has action and people behaving like people never behave but since its Neeson on the screen its totally acceptable. The fact that three grown men can't take him down in a fight is completely believable because he's Irish and that's just a thing they can all do, male or female. Now all's there is to do is sit back and wait for Taken 3 where he and his family are abducted by aliens.

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