It took me forever to do it but I finally got around to seeing Iron Man 3 starring Robert Downey Jr. And boy was I disappointed. I have really liked the previous Iron man movies, even part two which a lot of people shit on. I was looking forward to this one for so many reasons and each of those reasons was kind of dashed away. I knew Downey would be good as Tony Stark/Iron Man. That wasn’t my worry at all. I was looking forward to the villain, seeing a bunch of Iron Man suits wrecking things, and hopefully a cameo from one of The Avengers.
The movie is about Stark being mentally fucked after his short trip through that wormhole at the end of Avengers. He cant sleep and it is affecting his behavior. Guy Pearce shows up and he’d met Stark years ago and since then looks all swarthy and getting cozy with Gwenyth Paltrow’s Pepper Parks. Pearce was pretty much Sam Rockwell with more screen time. I just saw this movie and am having trouble trying to figure out the order of things. It is all jumbled which makes sense because that is how this movie was.
The humor that came out of nowhere didn’t fit the things that were happening on screen. They would show troops being blown up and Mandarin being all serious and then oh here’s something to lighten the mood! It didn’t work that way. I cant laugh because the suit isn’t behaving one second and then take innocent people being blown up seriously.
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| "Nyuck nyuck nyuck!" |
The effects in the movie were cool. I will say that. Well, not all of them. There’s a character switch that happens and when he uses powers it looks like some crap you would see on the WB. Oh, speaking of switches! There is one that is a huge part of the story and it pissed me off so bad! I really wished it hadn’t happened and until the very end kept on saying to myself “They are gonna change it right back. I watch wrestling. This is gonna be a double swerve!” Nope. They stuck with it. Towards the end of the movie so much nonsense was happening that I couldn’t even be upset anymore. I just had to sit through the credits and wait for the bonus scene…which stunk. Damn it!
I know I didn’t mention Don Cheadle as Iron Patriot and that’s because it wasn’t all that interesting. And even though Stark’s armor is made for him anyone can put it on. ANYONE. Fucking Paltrow wears it at one point and then she…ugh. You’ll have to see for yourself. I didn’t really spoil this because, well, there’s not much to spoil. Not sure if the change in director was the problem or the story. Either way this is the first Iron Man movie I have no desire to see again or own.
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| They are handing these suits out like candy. |
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