Nothing But Gossip October 3rd 2014

Charlie Sheen went off on a dental technician who accused him of being high on cocaine and attacking the dentist. “Hey cholesterol pants: Maybe you should have taken the crack you so brazenly and ignorantly accused me of being on, and sold it! Now that you're a jobless washout and a traitor, you're gonna need the extra dough...lick those food stamps, you desperate troll.”

Amanda Bynes is back at it again. After being on the down low for a while and under the watchful eye of her parents she was in school and quiet. Now she has already been arrested while driving under the influence of Adderall, kicked out of school because of weed, and her parents had no idea until news of her arrest got out. Her parents look old as old get out and don't need the stress. Hopefully she gets out of L.A.

George Clooney and Amal Alamuddin are now married. They sold pictures from the wedding (there was a shitload of rules for pictures being taken) to magazines for charity.

Wal-Mart is trying to take little to no responsibility for their driver plowing into Tracy Morgan's vehicle and injuring him and killing on of his friends. They are trying to blame Morgan for not wearing a seat belt. Yeah...

While leaving a show a fan grabbed Chris Brown's face and tried to kiss him and he forearmed her in the face. She takes full responsibility for it. Good for her. Speaking of CB his mother and girlfriend are worried that he is hanging with too many gang members. Whatever could they mean?

Oh...

Khloe Kardashian's boyfriend French Montana has finally gotten a divorce from his wife and mother of his 4 year old, Nadeen Kharbouch. I checked her out and she looks...interesting.

Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis are parents now. Yay, I guess. They released a statement along with the child’s name. “Mila and I would like to welcome Wyatt Isabelle Kutcher to the world.” I'm done bitching about what people name their kids. I want to welcome my new child Ampersand Doorknob Sagebush.

Justin Bieber, Selena Gomez, Kris Jenner, Kim Kardashian, and Paris Hilton are all combining to create something that will both terrify and annoy me. Selena notoriously stopped talking to daughters Kylie and Kendall Jenner after Coachella saying they were terrible humans. Stay tuned for more details.

Swimmer Michael Phelps was arrested for DUI for the second time which means this is just the second time he has been caught doing it. Jackass.

Jennifer Lopez and Leah Remini were rear ended in Malibu by a drunk driver. I'd like to rear end both of 'em...

Thanks to that whole The Fappening thing where all the hot famous women got hacked, actress Meagan Good is not loading anymore pictures of herself nude to her computer.

Damn. Damn. Daaaaaaaamn!

Nick Cannon has gotten the giant tattoo of his future ex wife's name Mariah Carey covered up on his back. He shouldn't have gotten it in the first damned place.

Stephanie Seymour's son 20 year old Peter Brant Jr. was arrested for weed. You may know them as the mother and son that look way too close in photos.

Ew.

Shelly Sterling called the cops after visiting her husband(?) Donald Sterling and finding V. Stiviano there chilling with him. She thought she had broken into the home not realizing that Donald just wanted some stank on his old hang low.

Wiz Khalifa and Amber Rose are divorcing and there is a lot of blame going around. They have been married for about a year and of course have a child. So, fellas, get your penises ready. Bet she wishes that she hadn't gotten a tattoo of his face on her damned arm!

Graciela Nahle, the crazy chick that keeps trying to get in with Shia LaBeouf, has been ordered to stay away for the next three years. That's like two weeks in crazy translation. 

Vitalii Sediuk has been busy being a fucking idiot and attacking celebrities. A while back he got Leonardo DiCaprio, Brad Pitt, got bitch slapped by Will Smith, recently tackled Kim Kardashian, and now stood next to Ciara wearing a tuxedo jacket and a thong. Police in Paris don't give a fuck because they like letting famous people get attacked and killed there. You should see the video with Kim. Kanye West gets out on the other side and she freaks the fuck out when attacked.

Best. Photo. Ever.