"Bad Mamma Jamma": Michelle Rodriguez

“Well, could you really imagine me playing the girlfriend that needs rescuing? Or the girlfriend?” Michelle Rodriguez

Oh, this weeks Bad Mamma Jamma is Michelle Rodriguez. She is the definition of hot and dangerous. Like for reals dangerous. I need to point out that she has the hottest mug shot out of any actress. For serious, it is nice. She is always cast as the tough girl or the deadly girl. I don’t mind that at all. Because even if she punched me in the throat I could sit here and say “Michelle Rodriguez totally touched me!” I first saw her in Girlfight. Meaning I saw her in a commercial for the movie since I’ve never actually seen it. I did see The Fast & The Furious and I was all like “A-guh…!” I really do make that sound and its just as unsexy as you imagine.

Ms. Rodriguez is what is known as a “goer.” What does that mean exactly? Whatever I want it to mean. it’s a really vague term that means that I think that she is down to do whatever. Like whatever. I’d love to hang out with her and get shitfaced and wake up two days later wearing just my sock and watch and the waistband of my draws with no memory of what happened. And is it weird that I think she looked hot as a zombie in Resident Evil? She was also in Machete and set the record as the hottest chick to wear an eye patch. She got shot in the eye and survived! Take that, death! She was in S.W.A.T but we don’t talk about that…

She once said “I don't want people thinking of me sexually. I don't want people to be like, ‘She’s hot-looking,’ you know? I want them to listen to me for what I am saying. And I think the best way to do that is to sniff my armpits, and like, sit and burp every now and then. It just completely throws people off.” No it doesn’t. Every girl on the planet is a disgusting beast but I still want to live in them Ton Ton style. If you don’t wanna be looked at sexually stop looking like you. Stop wearing what you’re wearing in the pictures I chose. This weeks BMJ will kiss you, knee you in the nuts, get drunk, and then arrested. You can just imagine what life is like after 7a.m! Jesus. There needs to be like four more of this woman on the planet. This should've been a Fap File entry.