Theater Whore: Thor Ragnarok

Thor Ragnarok 10/10

This morning my ass raced to the theater to see Thor: Ragnarok because I didn't want any spoilers (which this review would have because it is a review an you shouldn't be reading them unless you expect to be spoiled by some things) and because this is the first Thor movie that looked interesting to me. The first Thor movie stunk. The second one was worse than the first. But when I saw the trailer for this one I got hype as shit and had to see this. On a previous blog post rating my excitement levels for upcoming Marvel movies (click here for that) I gave this a 1/5. That should tell you how much I enjoyed this.

The Review: The Jungle Book

The Jungle Book 7/10

I got around to watching the live action version of The Jungle Book expecting to not enjoy it for some reason. I had it sitting in my Netflix queue just wondering if I would ever get around to watching it. I did and really liked it. It took me a little bit to get used to the way some of the animals looked but once I did I was all in. This is about a kid named Mowgli...I am not going to tell you what The Jungle Book is about, you weirdos. Kid raised by wolves, begins to act a bit too human for animals taste, and is led towards a place where he can be left.

The Review: Luther Season 4

Luther 8/10

I finally got around to watching Series 4 of the BBC show Luther starring Idris Elba. Again, a great example of something being less is more for a TV show. The previous seasons had four episodes but this one had just two of them. To me there has not been a single wasted moment in this series and this was no exception. Considering there were just two episodes that would have been terrible. This continues after the previous season where Luther has left the police force and something happens that upset the shit out of me at the start of the episode. I won't say what but, damn it. I hope its not true. This is the type of show that I can't picture anyone else doing and when I heard there was an American remake possible I just rolled my eyes so hard I fell down.

Theater Whore: Beasts Of No Nation

Beasts Of No Nation 9/10

I asked Cam who also saw Beasts Of No Nation if I should make this a Theater Whore post instead of a The Review. It was in the theaters for a minute so I went with yes because the herd for good movies this year is thinner than the backstage area of a Victoria Secrets show. This movie was written, directed, and filmed by Joji Fukunaga who also did the same for the first season of True Detective which was great. This stars Idris Elba and new actor Abraham Attah as Commandant and Agu. Commandant is a part of a revolution taking place in West Africa while Agu is dragged along for a violent, intense, incredible ride.

Agu is just a young boy in his village enjoying time with his friends and family while on the precipice of chaos as a war takes place. One day he is separated from his family and eventually the rest are slaughtered as they try to escape soldiers. He makes his way into the jungles where he is found by other young boys armed to the teeth. He joins up and fucking madness ensues.

10 Reasons Why You Should Have Watch Luther

If you have not seen the BBC series Luther starring Idris Elba maybe you just have something against good TV or you're one of those people that say you don't have time to watch TV but spend hours texting every day which proves you are terrible at time management. Or perhaps you are someone that thinks they have enough shows to watch and do not need to see another cop show. Wrong! You can keep your shuffling ass zombies or contests to crown the next a American loser. I'll stick with this show about a detective that is always on the edge of losing his shit.

This is about a Detective Chief Inspector named John Luther. Luther is as someone tells him “Fighting for the dead.” He can not have a healthy relationship no matter how much he thinks he can. He does things that are beyond illegal for what he thinks are good reasons. He could also steal your wife with a wink. That is a superpower I've been working on for years now. This show has now aired three series (that is what they call seasons over there) which consist of six, four, and four episodes. Here are the 10 Reasons Why You Should Have Watch Luther. Don't be stupid. You know this will contain spoilers.

Theater Whore: No Good Deed

No Good Deed 7/10

This was a fun movie. I watched this with my cousin Mala and this is one of those movies that you will either love or hate. I think a lot of it depends on what kind of movies you watched growing up. No Good Deed was like a lot I saw as a kid and loved so I was all in. I went from smacking my lips at bad decision making to cheering then back to smacking my lips. Then I cheered again. There will be lots of spoilers.

In this Idris Elba plays Colin Evans a guy that was charged for killing a guy in a bar fight defending his girlfriend. Yeah, there's something about him maybe killing five other women as well. He doesn't get paroled after pretending he is all good now and escapes from the prison transport. He immediately finds his former girlfriend and confronts her about not opening any of his letters or contacting him. He chokeslams her, breaks her neck, then pummels her with a lamp. Women still want him though because it's Idris.

Theater Whore: Thor: The Dark World

Well...fuck. You know that thing that used to happen more often in the early 2000's when a movie would have a shit ton of good actors in it but it would still be a terrible film? That's Thor: The Dark World. This movie had everything that angers me in action films. Humor when there doesn't need to be, random ass soldiers that are supposed to be so dangerous but are easily killed, and goddamn smoke monsters! I hate smoke monsters. No, you don't even understand. Let me talk about this hour and a half long TV show passing itself off as a movie.

It starts off with a battle happening years and years ago where the bad guys lose and hide something important. Not destroy it, hide it. This ain't Christmas! Meanwhile in the present Tom Hiddleston as Loki is being arrested for all the bullshit he did in The Avenger's and is locked up. Meaning hidden. Again. This ain't Christmas! Kill this fucker! In a few days he revealed that the gods were really real and tried to bring aliens to Earth and destroy it. Fuck this guy. Natalie Portman playing Dr. Jane Foster aka The Least Likely Doctor Since Denise Richards In The World Is Not Enough is still on Earth looking up mysterious shit and waiting for Thor to come back even though he's been gone for two years and the last time he was on Earth he didn't even come by to say hello.

Theater Whore: Pacific Rim

Giant robots punching monsters in the face! Tonight I got to see Pacific Rim two days before the premiere and I fucking loved this movie. After Kiyoshi (click here to check out and purchase his short story its very good) tagged me in a post with the trailer I damn near lost my mind. No, I actually did lose my mind. 

I have always wanted to see this movie without even knowing it. I never thought that while I was alive that I’d get a cool giant robot movie. Don’t even mention Transformers. I swear I will scissor kick the shit out of anyone that thinks this is even close to that crap. Guillermo Del Toro who has made almost nothing but incredible films has managed to create something that is not just amazing to look at, but has a real story, great acting, and real laughs in it. 

One of the best things about this movie is the fact that the robots seem to have real weight to them. When they moved it appeared as if they were real giant man made creations and not big computer generated images on the screen that looked real. When the pilots were hit it seemed painful. 

The movie stars Charlie Hunnam who is like a better acting version of Chris Hemsworth and was great in 3, 2, 1 Frankie Go Boom as one of the pilots of the Jaeger, Gypsy Danger, along with his brother. After a tragedy he retires and works in construction. The way the robots work is you and another pilot hook up to these robots and synch together. I won’t ruin why there needs to be two pilots but there really needs to be. Its not pretty when there aren’t. 

Stop It Tyler Perry

Oh, that Tyler Perry. A Lot of people are upset since he was cast in the latest Alex Cross based film. I’m not upset so much as I am annoyed. Perry’s face bothers me. Yes, I have seen his Madea films and they are funny to a point. Let me describe all the films for you. Madea acts crazy and violent, some girl is a hooker or a hooker addicted to drugs or a woman being beaten by her boyfriend/husband/pimp, meets Christian man, he likes her but she likes being punched, eventually she likes him. The end.

"Black people love me!"

Its hard to replace someone like Morgan Freeman. I mean, come on, he was God in a movie. He can narrate anything and make it interesting. If he called me while I was taking a shit and started describing its smell and texture I would tape it and it’d be a number one film. I’d call it “Apple Juice & Flaming Hot Cheeto’s: A Tale Of One Man’s Pain.” Boom.

"Bad Ass Mofo": Idris Elba

This weeks Bad Ass Mofo is one of those actors that come along once in a while that every man wants to be. He may be the nicest man alive in reality but in movies and TV shows he is a damned beast! I was watching the second season of Luther and I forgot what it was like to wait for him to lose his shit. He was born Idrissa Akuna Elba and an only child but still managed to turn out awesome. He’s did everything from tire fitting to working as a DJ, which he still does. Born in Hackney, London, England, you wouldn’t know it from some of his roles like that of Stringer Bell on The Wire.

Someone's about to get extra body holes.

It would be really easy to hate a guy that is talented, handsome, and funny. Yeah, we all want it and hate when others have it. But he seems like such a cool guy you cant hate him. I had no idea but he was this one dude I remember from an episode of Ab-Fab where during an orgy he sprayed his tongue with stiffening spray and it wouldn’t go back in his mouth. Other shows included like I mentioned The Wire, The Big C, The Office, and Luther which he won a Golden Globe for.

TV Slut: Luther

There’s a show that comes on BBC that is great. No, not Being Human, because that show wrecked itself in season four. This show is now in its second season and its called Luther. It stars Idris Elba as Detective Chief Inspector John Luther. Luther has what some would call “anger management issues.” I call it “What everyone wants to do at least five times a day but cant because jail sucks!”

How everyone feels about IKEA furniture.

The show starts off with Luther getting a confession from a guy that is dangling. Luther lets him drop to his apparent death. The guy ends up in a coma that Luther hopes he never wakes from since he knows that Luther pretty much left him to die. Mix in some crazy broad that killed her parents and the dog and gets away with it and you have yourself a recipe for disaster!