"Can I Finish?!": Doug & Courtney

One of the main purposes of this and a few other sites of mine are the inform you about shit you honestly don’t care about. You don’t know who Courtney Stodden or Doug Hutchison are. I mean, if you do then you have just as much free time to learn about nobody’s and H-List actors. This is the wedding photo of Courtney and Doug. She’s a 17 year old girl (16 when they hooked up). He’s a 51 year old that was on Lost, Punisher: War Zone, and The Green Mile. Besides the age difference, and you know the whole it being illegal thing, there’s far more issues I have with these two who if they give birth to a child will either be the Cloverfield monster and/or Cthulhu.

"Leave me the fuck out of this!" 

I’m sure a lot of you are asking “Dante, what’s business is it of yours if these people get married? They’re in love!” To which I’ll respond “She’s a child!” or if I’m hungry and/or horny “Fuck your lifestyle!” Her mother signed off on the marriage saying that its totally fine. Why? I know there are some parents reading this. Would it be fine with you if your teenage daughter who isn’t legally allowed to drink, join the military, or smoke a cigarette marry a guy 30-something years older than her? Maybe older than you! So fuck the mother for saying this is fine and Doug for being a nasty bastard that thinks its fine to date a kid. This is his third marriage by the way. What planet am I on?!

Another thing that bothers me is that this girl says she hasn’t had any work done. Okay now. There are some people when they get stuff done they get it done well. Its subtle and you don’t really know it unless you see their face often (Jennifer Lopez). This is Courtney a couple years ago. I know that people mature. Girls get boobs. Guys grow facial hair…most times. Hey, we’re not using me as a teen for example, okay? People don't care when someone gets work done and say so. It gets to people when someone says they didn't get any work and are vehement about it. This girl is gonna be on Dr. Drew's show getting an ultrasound to prove that she isn't fake in any sense. I say stand as far away from the machine as possible. That thing may explode from laughter. But you don’t go from the image above to this naturally as a teen.

Yeah, no work done here. And she looks even older when you see video of her. God, if you think you’ve seen a terrible and annoying interview and you haven’t seen this couple together then you cant honestly say that you’ve seen a terrible and annoying interview. “Mmm-hmm!!!” every time Doug says something. This girl should be planning on her graduation and going to prom. Not on what her husbands favorite color is and tweeting. In case you don't know I'm on Twitter as well here. Oh, never seen her Twitter? Here’s some gems from it. I'm not responsible for any rage you may feel after reading these or checking hers out.

Passionately placing my playful paw around the potent polish as I pop open the powerful paint of perfection - MEOW!


Lounging alluringly by this large liquidy pool in a lacy light suit that latches on to my lustrous outline libidinously ;)


Satisfying my sexy sweet-tooth on this delicious holiday by sweetly suckling on several sugary snacks; Have a Happily Haunting Halloween! ;)


Exotically crawling through such a kittenish day as my saucy senses playfully pounce on every single frisky fantasy that comes my way; Rawr!


Washing my whispering wants in nothing but the wondrous waters of the world. It's Wet & WILD Wednesday! XOs ;)

This girl can go right to hell with her goofy ass husband.