The crazy Mariah Yeater broad that said (past tense) that Justin Bieber was her baby’s daddy is in hiding after he ponied up his DNA for the paternity test. How long till that same DNA is on Ebay?
Wesley Snipes owes American Express almost $30,000. “Wait your turn!” the IRS said.
Mila Kunis went to the Marine Ball as she promised. Now can we stop with this asking celebrities out bullshit?! Yeah, I get it, you’re in the military and blah blah blah. But stop. Betty White of all people has been the only one to say no. But that was because the dude was a Blacker.
I knew I’d get the Lohan name on here somehow. Kate Major, the goofy dame who dated Michael Lohan, has checked herself into rehab. Then she’ll probably relapse and try to get on one of Dr. Drew’s hundred shows. “You’re probably right…” Common Sense said.
Tori Spelling, probably in a fit of jealousy that her gambling mama got so much attention last week, “accidentally” Tweeted a topless picture of herself. One of her kids take up 80% of the picture but NASA saw them areolas!
The chick that slept with Ashton Kutcher (one of…) says she feels betrayed. Hey. Hookers don’t get to feel betrayed! You knew he was married. You knew he was famous. Now you’re trying to stay in the papers based off the fact you fucked a famous, married man.
DMX and his estranged wife are trying to get their marriage back together…on a reality show. Fuck me.
Rapper(?) Daddy Yankee is being sued by a promoter for causing so much stress his eyes bled. Jay-zus!!!
A man named Bruce Hulse is suing MTV for stealing his idea for The Jersey Shore. Why claim you created that hot mess? That’s like saying “Yeah, I was the one that farted!” in an elevator.
Katt Williams has lost custody of his daughter. That’s fine though. He has seven adopted children. (spits orange juice) What?!?!
Anne Hathaway was at Occupy Wallstreet when she should’ve been at Occupy My Pants. I was waiting all night, you saucy wench!
And for no reason Lucy Liu!
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