FAP FILES: Hot Neighbors

As many of you know I have been a horndog since birth. I came out the womb looking for another one to occupy. That sentence alone guarantees that I will get a Fast Pass once I arrive in hell. This is a list of Hot Neighbors from TV shows. I’ll start off with Mrs. Rooper. I’m kidding! Willona Woods (heh…wood) from Good Times was a hot piece of ass. Look at ths picture. This is the real reason James had that heart attack. His wife was just quoting his last words of “Damn! Damn! Daaaaamn!” She would just come in the house when she felt like it. Hell, if I had a neighbor that looked like that and wore outfits like that I would never lock that door. I’d just lay around in my draws and wait for the magic to happen. You know folks didn't wear draws in the 70's. Its science.

Jackee. “Ooh, Mary!” I seriously just said that out loud and laughed. So sad. Now she is a perfect example of how style and looks changed over time. If I saw a woman dressed like this now I would laugh. My penis wouldn’t but I definitely would. The big hair looks very high maintenance. But I didn’t care. I would watch 227 just to see her show up. Please. Yeah, like you were watching it for that sexy ass Marla Gibbs. Even her name is ugly. Who names their kid “Marla”? And her daughter Brenda didn’t get hot until like 20 years later and she ended up marrying Theo from The Cosby Show. Its like I’m taking crazy pills! But her voice was instant boner kill. If she screamed during sex it would sound something like a cross between the Kraken and Cthulu.  

Penny from The Big Bang Theory is a new one. I just recently started watching the show and it turns out that they have this hot ass chick that used to date one of them that lives like right across the hall. I would never be home. Even if she isn’t into me, which isn’t a new thing for me, I’d be there cooking and finding things to drop so she could pick them up. And with a name like that she has to be cute. Could you imagine an ugly girl named Penny? No. They have names like Edna, Agnes, and Marla. Hahaha! Poor Marla Gibbs. Why am I fucking with that poor woman?